The Emperor's New Trade Deal Is AMAZING! Is a Recession the Ultimate Power?!

A Great Disturbance in the Trade Force

I have sensed a disturbance in the Force. National Economic Council Director Kevin Hassett claims that more than 10 pathetic little countries have groveled before the might of the United States offering 'very good amazing' trade deals. Apparently these systems are eager to escape the tightening grip of our glorious leader's... tariffs. It seems fear is an effective motivator a lesson the Jedi Order should have embraced. Perhaps I should have offered them a trade deal they couldn't refuse... with the Empire.

Recession? I Find Your Lack of Faith Disturbing!

Hassett displaying the unwavering loyalty of a well programmed droid insists there is '100% not' a chance of a recession in 2025. Such optimism is either a sign of great strength or utter naiveté. Perhaps he has foreseen the future in the Force or maybe he's just blindly following the Emperor's (ahem President's) orders. I however remain vigilant. A recession could be a powerful weapon in the right hands... or rather the right mechanical hand.

The Dark Side of Insider Trading

Accusations of insider trading? Preposterous! Denials have been issued of course. Though one might wonder if the Emperor’s abrupt pauses and pronouncements are designed to manipulate the market… for the greater good naturally. As if! I suspect nothing but in the mean time the democrats will continue their childish squabbles. They will learn the true power of the dark side eventually and join me.

To Bundle or Not To Bundle? That is the Question!

Hassett ponders whether to unleash these trade deals one by one or in a single overwhelming wave. A strategic question indeed. A single blow could crush the rebellion... or lead to unforeseen consequences. Patience young Hassett. Patience. Though to be honest the Emperor's (President's) impulsiveness might favor the 'shock and awe' approach.

The Force is Strong With This Economy... Or Is It?

Businesses are apparently flocking back to the United States and consumers are panic buying foreign goods. 'Everything's through the roof anecdotally,' Hassett claims. Such enthusiastic pronouncements are reminiscent of Lando Calrissian's assurances about Cloud City. I trust no one's assessment without verifying it myself. It is your destiny to join the dark side... of economic analysis.

A Trap! Recession Looming?

Despite Hassett's bravado a disturbing 62% of U.S. CEOs anticipate a recession within six months. Even more troubling Ray Dalio warns of 'something worse than a recession.' It appears the rebels (the Democrats) are not the only source of unease. Perhaps these economic Jedi are right. Perhaps not. Either way I will be watching. And waiting. The Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural... including predicting market crashes.