Chaos Theory: Oil Markets Face Triple-Digit Nightmare as US Enters Mideast Fray

A World on Fire: And It's Not Just Gotham

The world's gone mad. As if cleaning up Gotham wasn't enough now I have to worry about global oil prices? The US decided to jump into the Iran Israel spat and suddenly everyone's talking about triple digit oil. Triple digits! Alfred's going to have a field day with the Batmobile's fuel consumption. This isn't a game; this is chaos and chaos as we know is a ladder. And I don't like heights.

Strait of Hormuz: More Like Strait of Doom

The Strait of Hormuz – apparently some crucial waterway where 20 million barrels of oil slosh through every day. Now Iran's threatening to close it. Typical villain move. Block a vital resource hold the world hostage. I've seen it all before just usually with slightly less petroleum involved. If they close it some analysts are saying the West will jump in. Great another powder keg. I swear these guys need a good swift 'BAM!' and 'POW!' to the face.

Experts Predict: Pain at the Pump (and Everywhere Else)

These so called “experts” – they’re all saying the same thing: This is bad. Real bad. One of them some guy named Kavonic says oil prices could hit $100 a barrel. Another one McNally thinks this could be a longer conflict than the last two Gulf Wars. Fantastic. Just what the world needs: more conflict more explosions and more reasons for people to ask 'Where does he get those wonderful toys?'... and the oil to power them.

Volatility's Back: The Oil Market's on Edge

Apparently there’s a “CBOE crude oil volatility index.” Sounds like something the Riddler would use to measure the chaos he's about to unleash. It's at levels not seen since Russia decided to invade Ukraine. People are nervous. Traders are twitchy. And the world is one bad decision away from an economic meltdown. Just another Tuesday night in Gotham I suppose.

False Hope: Maybe They're Just Bluffing?

Of course some “experts” – and I use that term loosely – are saying Iran's threat to close the Strait is just hot air. Rhetoric they call it. Like a Joker gas attack but with words instead of hallucinogens. One analyst Hari thinks traders are just being cautious and won’t panic… unless there’s a good reason to panic. Thanks for the reassurance. I feel so much better now.

Keeping It Cool: For Now Anyway

The good news if there is any is that no one's blown up any oil infrastructure yet. Babin from CIBC thinks both sides have an “incentive to keep oil out of the line of fire.” Which means they’re either playing it smart or they're saving the explosions for later. Either way I'll be watching. Always watching. Because in this world you're either part of the problem or you're about to become part of the solution. Time to suit up.