Farquaad's Folly! Iran and Israel Throwing Shade (and Missiles!) Like a Bad Shrek Prequel!

Donkey's Eye View: What in the Name of Duloc is Going On?

Alright alright settle down everybody! Donkey's here to tell you what's what. Seems like Iran and Israel are playing a REALLY intense game of tag... with missiles! They're firing at each other faster than I can eat a stack of waffles! Shrek always says 'War is ogre whelming,' and he ain't lyin' this time.

Run for Your Lives! (But Maybe Not *Too* Fast)

So both sides are telling folks to clear out. Israel's saying 'Hey Tehran we're coming for ya!' And Iran's all like 'Oh yeah? Well Bnei Brak get ready for a firework show!' If you're near any of these places maybe find a good swamp to hide in? Just watch out for Shrek he gets territorial about his mud.

Kaboom! Did Someone Order Extra Crispy News?

Now get this! Apparently a missile smacked right into a news studio in Iran! Can you imagine? The anchor was probably all like 'And now for the weather... OH MY GOODNESS!' It's like that time Fiona tried to teach me to sing opera. Explosive!

Oil's Well That Ends... Expensive?

Of course all this missile y mayhem is messing with the oil prices. They're doing a little dance up and down up and down. Investors are probably sweating more than I do after chasing a dragon. And get this it is going to mess with our parfait supply!

Gold's Gone Fishin' and the Stock Market's Fine... For Now

Surprisingly the stock market in Tel Aviv is actually doing pretty well! Maybe everyone's just used to the chaos? Gold on the other hand is taking a little nap. I guess even precious metals need a break from all the drama. The rest of the markets are behaving themselves... for now that is. I just hope the Dragon doesn't find out and starts hoarding gold.

Trump G7 and a Whole Lot of Headaches

So the big shots are talking about it at the G7 and Trump is weighing in like he knows all the answers. Shrek says politics are more complicated than making waffles and frankly I agree! Let's just hope they can sort this out before things go from 'Once Upon a Time' to 'Game Over!'