Believe It! Is the U.S. Economy About to Use the Rasengan on Itself?!

Dattebayo! The Economy's Feeling Down!

Alright listen up everyone! Naruto Uzumaki here reporting live from... well my ramen shop because even Hokages need to eat! Turns out there's some serious talk about a recession hitting the U.S. economy. A fancy survey by Deutsche Bank says there's almost a 50 50 chance! Believe it! That's like facing Pain without a strategy! I'm sweating more than when I'm trying to master a new jutsu!

Even Old Man Third Hokage is Confused!

So apparently these 'economists' (sound like another type of ANBU to me!) surveyed a bunch of people and they're all worried. Even though people still have jobs everyone's feeling uneasy. The big boss at the Federal Reserve Jerome Powell says things are 'strong overall,' but even he's lowering his expectations. It's like when Kakashi sensei says he's going to be on time – you just know something's up!

Stagflation? Sounds Like a Forbidden Jutsu!

The article keeps throwing around this scary word: 'stagflation.' Sounds like some kind of forbidden jutsu Orochimaru would use! Apparently it means higher prices and slower growth. They haven't seen this since the '80s! That's before I was even born! Makes me want to summon Gamabunta and hide under him until it passes!

The Market's Acting Like Sakura When Sasuke Leaves!

The markets are all nervous like Sakura chan when Sasuke teme leaves the village again! Some big shot investor guy named Jeffrey Gundlach thinks there's a 50 60% chance of a recession. Even Morgan Stanley is worried saying the U.S. might be at risk for 'stagflation.' Seriously someone needs to invent a jutsu to fix this!

Blame Game: Who's the Real Villain?

Now everyone's pointing fingers. Some say it's because of this President guy and his 'tariffs' (are those like ninja tools?). One economist even said the president could be the 'author of a deep recession.' Talk about a jutsu gone wrong! This whole thing is more complicated than trying to explain my love for ramen to a Hyuga!

CNBC Pro LIVE: Believe It! It's Time to Learn!

Hey if you're confused like me (and let's be honest who isn't?) CNBC is having some kind of exclusive event at the New York Stock Exchange. They're calling it 'CNBC Pro LIVE.' They'll have experts there like ninjas with all the answers! Maybe they can teach us how to use a Rasengan on this recession! I'm going to try and sneak in – maybe I can learn a thing or two. Dattebayo!