The Fed is Making Me Wait AGAIN!!! What's Taking So Long?

Inflation's Gone Wild!

Ugh so apparently these boring 'economists' are all in a tizzy because some 'inflation' thingy went up. Core personal consumption expenditures price index or whatever—it's at 0.4%! Biggest jump since January 2024! They were expecting less boom boom! Like come ON! If it's gonna go up let's make it a BIG explosion am I right? 2.8% over the last year? That's not chaos that's just…mildly irritating!

Spending? More Like...SNORE ding!

And get this people aren't even spending their money right! Consumer spending only went up 0.4%. Boooring! It should be fireworks of spending! Think of all the rockets and paint we could buy! Instead everyone's hoarding their cash like they're expecting Powder to steal it! What is wrong with people? "Here comes the money!" *laughs maniacally*

The Fed's in a 'Wait and See' Mood...BORING!

So the Federal Reserve (who even are they?) is all like 'Oh we gotta wait and see.' Wait for WHAT? The fun to start on its own? That's not how things work! According to some Ellen Zentner lady who sounds super important tariffs are messing everything up. Tariffs! More like…terri dull! "Rules are meant to be broken!" I’d rather break some heads!

Goods Prices Get a Mild Thrill Ride

Apparently goods prices went up a teensy 0.2% with recreational goods and vehicles leading the charge at 0.5%. Okay a LITTLE excitement with the vehicles but come on! I need explosions not mild inclines! Even gasoline is trying to ruin my fun prices went down by 0.8%. I need gas for my rockets and my shark guns! This is unacceptable!

Savings Accounts? Seriously?

People are SAVING more money? The personal savings rate is the highest it's been since June 2024! That's just…sad. What are they saving up for? More boring meetings? More waiting? Time to shake things up a bit don't you think? "Surprise! I'm back!"

Don't Miss Out On...MORE TALK! (yawn)

Oh and if you're into...talking and listening apparently there's some CNBC Pro LIVE thing at the New York Stock Exchange. Yeah I'd rather blow up the place but hey maybe you'll learn something. It's June 12. I'll be busy...elsewhere! "Questions? I'm full of 'em!"