OMG BMW's Having a Moment
Okay so like I heard BMW's profits totally tanked this year. Like a third of their money just vanished! Apparently China isn't feeling the Bimmer love anymore. And um hello tariffs? It's like so not fetch. As if I needed another reason to stick to my G Wagon. 'Riiiise and shiiine,' BMW because you're gonna need it!
Tariffs? I Don't Know Her
So these 'tariffs' are apparently a big deal. BMW's CFO is saying they're gonna lose like one percentage point on their earnings just because of these things! One percentage point! That's practically a whole lip kit launch! Like who even invented tariffs? Can we like cancel them?
China? More Like 'Chinah' Get a New Market
BMW is saying the 'challenging situation in China' is a major factor. Seriously? Time to find a new market guys! Maybe focus on like Calabasas? I'm pretty sure everyone here needs a new car every other week. Plus imagine the Insta pics! #BMW #Calabasas #Sponsored
Deliveries Down? Is That Bad?
Apparently their deliveries are down too. Something about a 'faulty braking system'. Like seriously?! I'm not a car expert obviously but even I know that brakes are kinda important. I need my cars to stop for photo ops and like avoiding paparazzi. Priorities people!
CEO Says What?
Okay so the BMW CEO Oliver Zipse is saying tariffs might not be the smartest thing. He's like 'Everything is connected!' I feel you Oliver! Just like my lip kits are connected to my empire! Maybe he should start a makeup line that will fix the bank problem... I'm just saying.
So What Does This All Mean For Kylie?
Honestly? Probably nothing. I'll still be driving around in my custom Rolls Royce and I'll still have more cars than I know what to do with. But like maybe this is a sign to invest in something else? Like a private island? Or a spaceship? The possibilities are endless! Anyway gotta go! Time for a lip kit restock and maybe a photoshoot with Stormi and Aire in front of the new jet. Bye!
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mwpenn94
This is why I only drive Teslas!
money1234
I need a lip kit to cope with this news!
buiphongtran
Does this mean no more free BMWs for influencers?
Mike25
Is this the end of luxury car culture?
bke143
OMG, this is like, totally cray!