Hyrule Skies in Chaos! Newark Airport Plagued by Ancient Tech, Missing Controllers!

A Link to the Past (and Present Problems)

By order of the Royal Family of Hyrule (and also like just me Zelda) I'm reporting live from… well not Hyrule. Apparently there's a place called Newark Liberty International Airport where things are messier than my attempts at baking a fruitcake for Link. Last week these 'air traffic controllers' – the folks who guide metal birds through the sky – had a bit of a 'technical difficulty.' Which in Hyrulian terms is like saying Ganon just has a 'slight disagreement' with peace.

Radar Gone Rogue: Navi's on Vacation?

The National Air Traffic Controllers Association (try saying that five times fast) said that these controllers “temporarily lost radar and communications with the aircraft under their control unable to see hear or talk to them.” Imagine trying to fight a Lynel when you can't see it or hear it roaring! That's basically what happened here except instead of Lynels it's just really big metal birds. I wonder if they tried yelling “HEY! LISTEN!” like Navi. Probably wouldn't have helped.

Staffing Shortages: Where Did Everyone Go?

Apparently this whole mess was so stressful that some controllers needed to 'take time off to recover'. I get it. Sometimes after a particularly tough battle with a horde of Bokoblins I just need a nice cup of Lon Lon Milk and a nap. But it seems these shortages are causing even more delays. It's a vicious cycle – like trying to catch Cuccos to get them to help you.

United Airlines Pulls a Tactical Retreat

United Airlines in a move that would make even the most cowardly Bokoblin proud is cutting 35 flights a day. CEO Scott Kirby blamed 'technology issues' and controllers walking off the job. The union denies the walk off. Everyone's pointing fingers like they're trying to blame who released Ganon from his prison.

Infrastructure Issues: A Gerudo's Scrap Heap?

U.S. Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy promises a 'brand new air traffic control system.' Hallelujah! Maybe it'll be powered by the Triforce! Duffy admits the current system is 'not effective.' Well duh! It's like trying to defeat Ganon with a wooden sword. New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy is urging Duffy to prioritize investments. It’s about time someone told them to get their act together. “Well excuuuuuse me Princess!” indeed.

The Future: Will We Ever Reach the Golden Land?

So what's the takeaway? Our aviation infrastructure is older than the Master Sword staffing is thinner than my patience when Link won't wake up and everyone's blaming everyone else. But hey at least the FAA will ground planes if things get too hairy. Because nothing says 'safe travels' like being stuck on the tarmac dreaming of soaring through the skies of Hyrule.