Good News Everyone! Another Plane Bites the Dust!

A Fiery Start A Crashing Finish

Good news everyone! It appears another one of those infernal flying machines has decided to return to whence it came – the ground! Yes a Boeing 787 Dreamliner operated by Air India has crashed shortly after takeoff in Ahmedabad India. A terrible tragedy of course a real kick in the pants! But as I always say 'When one door closes try to open it again. If that doesn't work you can always climb through the window. Or failing that just blast a hole in the wall.' Tragically there were 242 souls onboard and only one managed to avoid becoming a fine mist of organic matter. A real shame. The first crash of a 787. History in the making!

Dreamliner Deconstructed

This particular Dreamliner a Boeing 787 8 first took to the skies in December 2013 and was handed over to Air India shortly after. It was just one of 34 such aircraft in their fleet. These modern jets are all the rage for these longer routes. A real sign of progress. If by progress you mean hurtling through the air in a metal tube powered by controlled explosions. But even I Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth must admit it's more efficient than my old Smell O Scope for getting to Uranus.

What Went Wrong? Wrong Wrong Wrong!

According to those flight tracker doohickeys the plane barely made it to 625 feet before plummeting back to earth. Now I may be a mad scientist but even I know that altitude is crucial for avoiding ground based unpleasantness. From the initial reports the aircraft lost signal less than a minute after takeoff. It is thought to have crashed into a residential area. Very unfortunate for those poor souls.

The Blame Game Begins

The investigation is underway. They'll be looking at everything from the pilot's caffeine intake to the structural integrity of the lavatories. Oh the black boxes! Those infernal contraptions that record every grunt and whimper in the cockpit. They'll be sifting through the wreckage like archeologists on a dig searching for clues. They will also be examining video from the incident. Also the pilots' training and recent rest. Good luck with that finding people who get good rest these days!

Boeing's Bad Week. Or Century.

Ah Boeing. Remember those two 737 Max incidents? And the recent door plug fiasco? It seems Boeing's safety record is about as reliable as a politician's promise. Apparently some whistleblower snitched about Boeing taking shortcuts leading to 'excessive stress' on major airplane joints. I say if you're going to cut corners at least use a laser! Much cleaner. I do not believe there is a connection but only time will tell. Oh dear.

The Prognosis? Grim As Always!

What does this all mean for Boeing? Well I predict it involves a lot of paperwork finger pointing and possibly some strongly worded letters. Whether it impacts their bottom line remains to be seen but as a scientist I'm always prepared for the worst. After all 'Nobody's got my back... not even my back!'. I give it two weeks before the media moves on to something else.