Winter is Coming... to Wall Street: Trump's Trade Wars Chill Tech Profits

A Song of Tariffs and Ice

My loyal subjects Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen First of Her Name Queen of Meereen Queen of the Andals and the Rhoynar and the First Men Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons brings you grave tidings. It seems this Donald Trump a name whispered with concern even across the Narrow Sea is waging a war. Not with fire and blood mind you (though perhaps that would be simpler) but with tariffs! These 'tariffs,' I am told are making it difficult for even the mightiest of technology companies to plan. Imagine if you will trying to conquer Westeros while constantly changing the rules of the game. It's enough to make you shout 'Dracarys!' at the nearest offending trade agreement.

Block's Burnout and Airbnb's Airing of Grievances

The smallfolk it seems are feeling the pinch. Block a company dealing with… well blocks of something or other has offered a less than inspiring forecast. They speak of 'cautious stances,' which in my experience usually means 'impending doom.' Airbnb purveyors of temporary lodgings also bemoan a 'softness' in travel. Apparently the Canadians known for their politeness and love of ice hockey are hesitant to cross the border. Are they afraid of the tariffs or perhaps they've heard whispers of a new Mad King across the sea? I feel their pain. Ruling a kingdom is expensive business. One must find the gold to pay for my army and dragons after all!

Apple's Bite and Amazon's Agony

Even the seemingly invincible fortresses of the tech world are not immune. Apple a company rumored to possess magical devices that can summon knowledge from across the globe anticipates nearly a billion dollars in added costs. Tim Cook their leader admits predicting the future is 'very difficult' – a sentiment I a Queen who has seen prophecies and walked through fire can certainly empathize with! Amazon that vast marketplace of goods from across the world is also feeling the heat. They speak of 'recessionary fears' and 'tariff unpredictability.' It seems even Bezos fears the winter is coming and not just in the Game of Thrones sense.

Advertising: A Flicker of Dragonfire?

But amidst this gloom a glimmer of hope! It seems businesses that deal in advertising are thriving for now. Like the flicker of dragonfire in the darkness advertising revenue is on the rise. Perhaps these companies know something we don't. Perhaps they have discovered a way to manipulate the masses to make them desire things they do not need. Or perhaps they simply know how to distract people from the impending economic doom! Still even they warn of 'tougher waters ahead'. It seems as though even their future is in peril.

Meta's Mediocrity and Alphabet's Alphabet Soup of Woes

Meta formerly Facebook a place where people spend countless hours sharing pictures of their cats and arguing about politics is also feeling the pinch. Asian retailers it seems are curbing their spending on advertisements. And Alphabet the company behind Google (which knows more about you than your own mother) warns of a 'slight headwind.' Truly these are troubling times. Perhaps I should launch my own social media platform – 'DragonNet' – where the only acceptable posts are praise for the Mother of Dragons. That might solve everything!

Recession's Chilling Breath

Alas my friends the malaise spreads. Airlines restaurants and consumer retailers are all feeling the chill. The people it seems are losing hope. Consumer confidence is plummeting and whispers of 'recession' echo through the streets. It seems this Trump's tariffs like a White Walker army are slowly but surely freezing the economy. Perhaps it's time for me to intervene. Perhaps I should fly my dragons across the sea and remind everyone who the true Queen is. After all a little 'fire and blood' might be just what the economy needs to get back on its feet!