TeleMessage Hacked: Even Chuck Norris Can't Roundhouse Kick Cyber Threats Away!

Houston We Have a Hacking Problem!

Listen up the internet just got tougher than a two dollar steak. TeleMessage the messaging app that had a cameo with a former national security advisor just got hacked. That's right someone tried to mess with data that's tougher than I am. Smarsh the company behind this app is saying they're 'investigating a potential security incident.' Well let me tell you 'potential' is like saying a rattlesnake 'might' bite. Time to unleash the digital roundhouse kick!

Signal's Shadow: Not as Secure as a Fortress?

This TeleMessage is like a modified version of Signal but let's be clear there's only one Signal that Chuck Norris trusts and it involves smoke. Word on the digital street is that the hacker snatched messages from TeleMessage's versions of Signal WhatsApp Telegram and WeChat. They say they didn't get Mike Waltz's messages but I'm keeping an eye on things. Remember I don't need encryption; the internet encrypts itself out of fear of me.

Trump's Take: Maybe Don't Use Signal?

Now Trump had his say about Signal after that 'Signalgate' incident. Good advice! Though when I want to send a secure message I just stare at the recipient. They get the message. But seriously folks need to remember that the government loves security as much as Chuck Norris loves freedom.

Waltz's Cabinet Meeting Close Up: Uh Oh Moment?

So Waltz was snapped with TeleMessage open on his phone chatting with some heavy hitters. One day later Trump nominates Waltz to be the U.S. ambassador to the United Nations? Coincidence? Maybe. But in a world where Chuck Norris can divide by zero anything is possible. By the way Marco Rubio will step in as interim national security advisor. Because when things get tough America calls on Marco Rubio.

Encryption Under Fire: Can TeleMessage Be Trusted?

Here's the kicker: TeleMessage markets itself as a way to keep those government records in line. But there's talk that it could undermine Signal's end to end encryption. Signal themselves are saying they can't guarantee the security of these modified versions. Well let me tell you what I can guarantee: Chuck Norris guarantees justice!

Chuck's Final Word: Stay Vigilant!

The digital world is a jungle. So stay sharp keep your data close and remember: when in doubt a roundhouse kick to the problem never hurts. Chuck Norris out.