
Higher Further Faster... Down?
Hey Starforce Carol Danvers here reporting live from... well not space sadly. Turns out even cosmic heroes have to keep an eye on Earth's economy especially when it starts acting like a Kree warship on a collision course! So what's the buzz? Oil prices are taking a nosedive faster than I can say 'Photon Blast!' U.S. crude oil is down global benchmark Brent is down...it's like someone hit the 'reverse' button on the whole market. And guess who's getting the side eye? That's right Earth's very own President Trump and his tariff tango with China!
Toxic Cocktail Alert!
Apparently according to some Earthling called Helima Croft we're facing a 'toxic cocktail' of recession fears thanks to these tariffs. Add to that OPEC+ deciding to flood the market with more oil and you've got a recipe for...well economic indigestion. It's like when Goose thought he could handle that extra plate of Flerken kibble. Bad decisions all around! But hey at least nobody's trying to steal the Tesseract right? Small victories people small victories.
China's Playing Chicken?
Now China's not exactly backing down. They're vowing to 'fight to the end.' Sounds like someone's been watching too many gladiator movies. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent seems to think China's holding a losing hand like playing with a 'pair of twos.' Personally I think everyone needs to take a deep breath maybe meditate with a few Skrulls (the friendly ones of course) and remember that diplomacy is a thing. Otherwise we might all end up needing a cosmic bailout!
Tariff ic Times!
The U.S. tariff rate on China is about to skyrocket higher than when I use my binary powers – like seriously 104%! That's one way to get a party started I guess. But in all seriousness this could have some serious repercussions for everyone not just Earth. When economies clash it's like two supernovas colliding – messy and nobody really wins. Unless you're into that kind of thing I suppose. Some people just want to watch the world burn!
Is There an Off Ramp?
So what now? Well everyone's waiting to see if there's a 'potential off ramp' to this trade dispute. I'm hoping someone finds it soon because frankly I'd rather be dealing with intergalactic warlords than trade wars. At least with warlords you know where you stand. And you get cool space battles. Where are the space battles here?!?
Strap In Folks!
In the meantime buckle up folks! It's gonna be a bumpy ride. And maybe stock up on some extra shawarma just in case. You never know when you might need a little something to get you through the apocalypse... or just a slightly annoying economic downturn. Captain Marvel out!
oct262006
It's like the economy is doing a barrel roll... and failing.
haganmd
So, basically, stock up on gasoline now?
cambria
I'm moving to space. Anyone wanna join?
tazzie32
Trade wars are dumb. Can't we all just get along?
manuegfdgarcia321
Can Captain Marvel fix this with her cosmic powers?
crisp67
Someone needs to tell Trump to chill out.
chattybox666
Is shawarma inflation next?
elizabeths
I blame the Skrulls!
mopar1973
This is worse than Thanos snapping his fingers!