Higher, Further, Faster... To the Bank! Stocks Soar Amidst Economic Rollercoaster!

Economic Uncertainty? More Like Economic Shenanigans!

Greetings Earthlings! Carol Danvers reporting for duty! Seems like our little blue marble is spinning a bit faster than usual especially when it comes to the good ol' US economy. Atlanta Fed President Raphael Bostic says economic modeling is 'very difficult' right now. Well duh! It's like trying to predict what Goose is going to cough up next – chaotic and usually involving a hairball. Even Canada is doing the walk back on digital services tax talk about a plot twist worthy of a Kree thriller!

Trump's 'Big Beautiful Bill': Is It Really That Great?

Now about this 'big beautiful bill' of President Trump's that cleared a Senate hurdle... Sounds suspiciously like Ronan's promises of a 'better future' for the Kree. Remember how that turned out? Let's just say I had to punch a few holes in his plan. Bostic says we need to watch businesses and consumers' expectations on prices. Translation: are they gonna jack up the prices faster than I can say 'Photon Blast'? Seems some businesses are delaying their tariff strategy until 2026! 2026?! That's longer than it took me to figure out how to use a pager. Get your act together people!

The Fed's 'Dot Plot': A Cosmic Mess of Opinions

The Fed's 'dot plot' – a map of members' expectations for rates – shows a wide range of different outlooks. Honestly it looks like the map of every backwater planet I've ever visited chaotic and confusing. Even Fed Chair Jerome Powell is playing the waiting game which is unusual for a hero. Markets are hoping for rate cuts with some betting on a significant trim. Guess everyone's hoping for a little economic 'higher further faster' action without the inevitable face punching.

Trump vs. Powell: The Economic Smackdown We Didn't Ask For

Gilles Moëc from AXA Investment Managers thinks the new interest rate expectations are a reaction to Trump's attacks on Powell. Oh great. Another turf war. It's like watching the Kree and Skrulls bickering over galactic real estate – except this time it's our wallets at stake. Trump might even name Powell's successor early to undermine him. Talk about a 'shadow Fed' scenario! That's a recipe for volatility folks and could scare off foreign investors. We don't want our economy looking like a Skrull infiltration do we?

S&P 500: Up Down and All Around!

The S&P 500 closed at an all time high! It's like a rollercoaster designed by Rocket Raccoon. Big swings due to the White House's tariff story including a framework trade agreement with China. That's great! But let's not get too cocky. The US trade deal with the UK is reducing tariffs on some goods but a 10% duty remains on most items. Negotiating trade agreements is apparently 'very complicated and lengthy,' according to Bob Parker from the International Capital Markets Association. No kidding! It's like trying to negotiate peace between the Kree and Skrulls I'm still working on that one!

Trade Wars: An Extended Engagement?

Parker says these trade discussions could drag on to 2026 and there's a 'serious risk of trade negotiations failing.' Fantastic! With the EU there are several sticking points that could keep tariffs high. Markets might be taking a 'naive view' of what's happening on the trade front. Guess they haven't dealt with the Skrulls before. Bottom line? Buckle up folks! It's gonna be a wild ride. Just remember when things get tough I'm always ready to photon blast some sense into the situation! Danvers Out!