Tesla's Robot Revolution Hits a Glitch: Optimus VP Bails!

So Long Farewell Auf Wiedersehen Goodbye!

Well well well what do we have here? It seems my friend Milan Kovac Tesla's VP of Optimus has decided to hang up his robot building hat. He's leaving the building! I read about it and thought 'Even robots need a change of scenery right?' He posted a heartfelt goodbye on X thanking Elon for teaching him to 'discern signal from noise.' Sounds like my gluten free diet – always trying to filter out the bad stuff! Seriously though Milan all the best in your next chapter. Maybe you'll join my wellness center! We can all learn to discern the signal from the noise there! (Just kidding Elon!)

Optimus Prime – Time to Step Up Your Game!

Tesla is still on track to unleash Optimus onto the world. They're talking about building robots on their Fremont pilot production line in 2025 ready to 'do useful work across our factories.' That sounds… promising? But I'm sure there are many competitors in the space Boston Dynamics Agility Robotics Apptronik 1X and Figure. Reminds me of when I first came onto the tennis scene. Everyone was like 'Who's this Djokovic guy?' Now look at me! Number one... most of the time. Optimus my friend just needs to find its inner peace and dominate! Like I said 'Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion.'

Elon's $25 Trillion Dream – Robots Paying Our Bills?

Elon bless his 'pathologically optimistic' heart thinks these robots will boost Tesla's market cap to $25 trillion. Trillion! That's enough to buy like all the gluten free bread in the world! All I can say is I hope these robots can actually do more than just open doors and throw balls. I need them to make my green smoothie every morning without complaining. I want one that does my laundry while I meditate. And of course they must understand the importance of a good hug! Because as I always say 'The mind is like water. When it's turbulent it's difficult to see. When it's calm everything becomes clear.'

Primitive Tasks? More Like World Domination!

Elon says they're training Optimus to do 'primitive tasks' like picking up objects and opening doors. Okay that sounds a bit… underwhelming. I mean my five year old can do that (most of the time). But hey even I started somewhere. I wasn’t born serving aces at 200 km/h. As I always say 'It's not the will to win that matters—everyone has that. It's the will to prepare to win that matters.' We gotta train these robots people! Train them HARD!

The Plot Thickens!

Kovac was previously the director of Autopilot software engineering. I wonder if his departure has anything to do with self driving cars running into… well you know. He got promoted to VP of Optimus and now he's out. It's a mystery wrapped in an enigma served with a side of gluten free crackers. But whatever the reason I wish him luck! As long as he doesn't build robots to beat me at tennis we're good.

Tesla's Mum's the Word!

And of course Tesla is staying silent. Probably too busy building those $25 trillion dollar robots. They didn’t respond to any comments. But as I've learned sometimes silence is golden. As I always say 'You have to be true to yourself and be the best version of yourself and I think that’s mirroring my values and morals.'