Waymo Down! Even Robots Can't Handle My Level of Heat (or L.A. Protests)

Air Jordan Takes on AI: A Burning Issue

Alright world MJ here. I've seen a lot in my career. Clutch shots tough defenders bad fashion choices in the 90s *cough*. But even I was surprised to see those Waymo cars going up in flames in L.A. during those protests. Word is folks are steamed about the situation with ICE and President Trump. I get it. Passion is important just like having that killer instinct on the court. But torching robotaxis? That's… well let's just say it's not how I'd draw up the play. I've always believed you gotta attack the rim not the ride.

Defense is Key Even for Driverless Cars

Waymo's saying they pulled their service until things cool down and honestly that's probably a smart move. Even I had to adjust my game plan sometimes. You can't always drive straight at the basket when there's a triple team waiting. Sometimes you gotta pass set a screen or maybe… I don't know… develop a robotaxi that can dodge flaming scooters? Just spitballing here! They say they're working with the LAPD good they need all the help they can get. You can't win a championship with a weak defense and you sure can't navigate L.A. with flames licking at your tires.

Toxic Gases? Now That's a Bad Call

Seriously though all those burning batteries releasing toxic fumes? That's no joke. Hydrogen fluoride sounds nasty. It's one thing to dunk on somebody so hard they need medical attention; it's another thing entirely to create a public health hazard. I always played hard but fair and I expect the same from everyone else even protestors. Next thing you know these things are gonna start playing a zone defense.

My Advice to Waymo: Be Like Mike (and Maybe Hire Security)

Waymo's been rolling around L.A. since 2024 and other cities too. They thought they were in the clear. Well nobody gets a free ride especially not in a city like L.A. My advice? Toughen up. Adapt. Maybe add some countermeasures. Flamethrower on the roof? Okay maybe not. But some extra security or a self extinguishing system? Definitely something to consider. I had Dennis Rodman they need someone like him!

Is This the Beginning of the Robot Uprising?

Look I'm not saying this is the start of Skynet or anything but it does make you wonder. Are the robots gonna start fighting back? Will they demand better treatment maybe a union? Will they start trash talking? I've heard it all man. If they do I hope they bring their A game. I'm always up for a challenge even if it's against a car that thinks it can drive itself better than I can. Which by the way it can't.

Game Over? Nah Just a Timeout

So what's the takeaway? L.A.'s on fire literally and figuratively. Waymo's taking a timeout. And MJ's here to remind everyone that even the greatest sometimes have to adjust their strategy. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go practice my fadeaway. You never know when you might need it even against a self driving car with a grudge. Haters gonna hate but hey I'm still here. And I'm still the best. That's all folks!