Jack Dorsey's Bitchat: No Internet? No Problem! Lara Croft Investigates Off-Grid Messaging

Bluetooth or Bust

Right then darlings! Seems our tech guru Jack Dorsey has been tinkering again. This time it's Bitchat – a messaging app that laughs in the face of internet outages and government snooping. Bluetooth mesh networks? Sounds like my kind of adventure! No central servers no phone numbers just pure untraceable chatter bouncing between devices. As I always say 'The greatest treasures are not always gold or jewels.'

Whispers in the Digital Wind

The idea? To keep the conversation flowing even when the digital world throws a tantrum and cuts off the Wi Fi. Imagine trying to raid a tomb when the internet goes down. Nightmare fuel! This Bitchat creates a daisy chain of phones passing messages like secrets whispered in the dark. It's all very cloak and dagger which let's be honest is precisely how I like it. Remember 'We all make choices. But in the end our choices make us.'

No Peeking! (Unless You're Me Obviously)

Dorsey's pushing for privacy and so am I – can't have those pesky mercenaries tracking my every move now can we? Messages vanish into thin air leaving no trace on some corporate server. Ephemeral and encrypted! It's like the digital equivalent of quicksand – here one moment gone the next. Though unlike quicksand it won't swallow you whole hopefully. Very important distinction.

Echoes of Hong Kong

This reminds me of those clever chaps in Hong Kong using similar tech during the 2019 protests. Staying connected even when the powers that be try to pull the plug? Now that's ingenuity. It's about taking control owning your communication and giving the middle finger to censorship. Always a good look darling. This gives me an idea for my next adventure: infiltrating a digital fortress! This Bitchat seems like it could be useful.

Rooms with a View (and a Password)

Bitchat also offers 'rooms,' or group chats with passwords of course. So even group chats can be private. And I do so love a good password! Makes me feel right at home. And there will be an update to include wifi. It all sounds rather thrilling.

The Future is Decentralized (and Hopefully Trap Free)

So there you have it darlings. Dorsey's Bitchat is a fascinating experiment in reclaiming our digital autonomy. It's about saying 'no' to Big Tech and 'yes' to a world where communication isn't controlled by some all seeing eye. A world where no one not even Natla can track you! Now if you'll excuse me I have a tomb to raid – and a message to send... off grid naturally. 'I make my own luck.'