Microsoft's Got a Price on Their Head: EU Bounty Hunters Closing In!

This is the Way... of the EU?

A transmission came in today louder than a Hutt's belch after a spice binge. Seems the European Commission's got a bead on Microsoft. Apparently bundling their Teams app with Office 365 didn't sit well especially after some upstart named Slack (now swallowed by some bigger fish Salesforce) cried foul back in 2020. Now I've dealt with bigger bounties and messier entanglements than this but when the EU comes knocking even the biggest dejarik players start sweating.

Unbundle or Be Bundled… to the Rancor!

Microsoft's scrambling faster than a Jawa trying to scrap a downed TIE fighter. They're now promising to sell Office 365 and Microsoft 365 without Teams at a 'reduced price'. Reduced eh? Sounds like a shady deal a Gungan would offer. And they're even letting customers switch to other tools without Teams. It’s like offering a Wookiee a choice between a bowcaster and a thermal detonator – both are dangerous in their own way.

Interoperability: Sounds Like a Fancy Droid!

They're throwing around words like 'interoperability' now. Sounds like one of those shiny protocol droids. Supposedly it means Teams can play nice with other apps and they're letting customers yank their data out of Teams. Good luck with that. Getting data out of Microsoft is like trying to get a Sarlacc pit to spit out Boba Fett… oh wait.

Microsoft's Plea: 'We Have Spoken'!

Some fancy pants from Microsoft a Nanna Louise Linde claims these 'commitments' are the result of 'constructive good faith discussions'. Sounds like a politician trying to talk their way out of a blaster fight. But actions speak louder than words and I'll be watching to see if they actually follow through or if it's just hot air escaping like the exhaust of a faulty hyperdrive.

Slack's Still Got a Bone to Pick

Seems like the folks over at Salesforce (who now own Slack) ain't buying what Microsoft is selling. Their legal eagle Sabastian Niles says Microsoft's practices 'harmed competition' and demands a 'binding enforceable and effective remedy'. Sounds like they're ready to throw down a few credits to make sure Microsoft doesn't pull a fast one. I admire the grit.

The Price of Failing: More Than Just Beskar

So Microsoft's trying to avoid a big fine bigger than the cost of a whole suit of Mandalorian armor maybe. They've danced this dance before making promises and offering discounts. Will it work this time? Only the Force knows. But I'll tell you one thing: messing with the EU is like poking a sleeping Krayt dragon. You might just wake up something you can't handle. This is the way… I'll be watching from the shadows blaster ready just in case.