Bazinga! UAE Stargate Gets a Tech Boost: A Highly Intelligent Report by Dr. Sheldon Cooper

The Inevitable Rise of Artificial Intelligence (As Predicted)

As I Dr. Sheldon Cooper have long postulated the ascendancy of Artificial Intelligence is not merely probable but inevitable. This week's announcement of the "UAE Stargate" AI data center supported by intellectual powerhouses like Nvidia Cisco and OpenAI is further irrefutable evidence supporting my claims. While lesser minds might be surprised I find this perfectly logical. It's like discovering that water is in fact wet. A fact that like my intelligence is often overlooked by simpletons.

Nvidia's Shiny New Toys: Blackwell GB300 Systems

Nvidia in their infinite wisdom (or at least the wisdom gleaned from manufacturing the hardware that *actually* enables infinite wisdom) is supplying their latest Blackwell GB300 systems. One can only hope these systems are adequately cooled. A thermal runaway would be most inconvenient and let's not even discuss the potential for a cascading system failure. Though I would probably find that fascinating to observe provided I was at a safe distance naturally.

Stargate: A Transcontinental Convergence of Intelligence

The UAE Stargate is intended to collaborate with the U.S. Stargate project announced by President (yes *that* President) Trump. It's rather like a geopolitical game of Risk only instead of conquering territories with plastic armies we're building data centers. I wonder if the resulting AI will have a preference for certain world leaders. I for one would hope it recognizes the superiority of pure intellect and awards itself a Nobel Prize.

Oracle's Mysterious Absence (Or Is It?)

Intriguingly the presence of Oracle is…unclear. Larry Ellison a name I recognize from somewhere was involved in the U.S. Stargate. It's like Schrödinger's Cat but instead of a feline in a box it's a tech company at a data center announcement. Until confirmed Oracle is both present and absent a superposition that would surely intrigue even the great physicist himself.

Gigawatts and Square Miles: The Sheer Scale of Cognitive Potential

The UAE Stargate built by G42 will boast a 5 gigawatt capacity and span 10 square miles. The sheer scale is… impressive even for me. It's like a giant brain only instead of producing witty banter and groundbreaking theories it will be… well I suppose it *could* also produce witty banter. But I highly doubt it would rival my own. Bazinga!

Saudi Arabia Joins the Fray: Blackwell Chips Galore

Nvidia is also selling 18,000 Blackwell chips to a Saudi company called Humain. The chips will be used in Saudi data centers. Apparently artificial intelligence is rapidly becoming a global commodity. One can only hope that all this artificial intelligence doesn't lead to real artificial stupidity. We already have enough of *that* to deal with.