Holy Guacamole! Is Elon Musk Out at Tesla? This Kitty Has Opinions!

A Whisker Away from Disaster?

Madre de Dios! A rumor has spread like wildfire (or should I say like a *very* fast electric car) that Tesla was looking for a new Captain. A Wall Street Journal those sneaky banditos claimed Tesla's board was sniffing around for someone to fill Elon Musk's very large shoes! My whiskers were twitching with disbelief! A CEO search? *Dios mio* that would be a catastrophe of epic proportions!

Tesla Strikes Back: 'Absolutely False!'

But hold on to your sombreros amigos! Tesla chair Robyn Denholm herself came out swinging declaring the reports 'absolutely false!' on the social media battlefield known as X. She essentially said 'Elon Musk is the CEO *gatos* and we have faith in his grand plan!' Much better. It's good to know I can still trust my instincts and good judgement on Tesla's leadership!

Revenues Take a Tumble: Is the Golden Goose Losing Its Glimmer?

However! Not all is sunshine and *leche*. Tesla's revenue slipped faster than I can disappear in a cloud of smoke – a 9% drop to be precise! The automotive segment took a particularly hard hit down 20%. It seems the electric steeds need some upgrades and that can put a dent in even the most impressive treasure chests eh?

Profits Plunge: A Purr plexing Predicament

The *gato* is out of the bag! Profits went down faster than I can drink a bowl of milk! A 71% plunge! *Ay caramba!* Even I Puss in Boots feel a shiver down my spine. Could this be a sign of… the impossible? Is Tesla's stock doomed to be worth less than my weight in kibble? One can hope not!

Musk's Side Hustle: Distraction or Genius?

And then there's the matter of Mr. Musk's 'Department of Government Efficiency.' Is this a brilliant strategy to save the world one government agency at a time? Or is it a distraction from the real quest: keeping Tesla on the road to glory? Only time will tell my friends. But I still can't get over such an unoriginal name. 'Department of Government Efficiency'? Seriously?

Puss's Prognosis: A Sword and a Prayer

So what's the verdict? Is Tesla heading for the sunset or will it rise again like a phoenix from the ashes? I'll keep my boots polished and my sword sharpened ready to defend the electric future… or at least provide a dramatic distraction while you all escape! But one thing's for sure amigos: the ride is far from over. Vamanos!