Winter is NOT Coming: Walmart's Toy Gun Fumble in New York!

A Queen's Decree Ignored (Sort Of)

Hmph it appears even across the Narrow Sea... or rather in the land of 'New York,' laws meant to protect the innocent are tested. Attorney General Letitia James a woman who I daresay possesses a certain fire has taken Walmart to task for allowing these... 'toy guns' to infiltrate her kingdom. These trinkets meant for play bear too much resemblance to weapons of war. It seems Walmart like some lords in Westeros has a bit of trouble keeping its bannermen (or in this case third party sellers) in line.

Dragonglass vs. Plastic: A Matter of Perspective

I Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen First of Her Name Queen of the Andals and the Rhoynar and the First Men Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons have seen weapons of all forms. From the sharpest Valyrian steel to the crude clubs of the Dothraki. A toy gun one might think is harmless. But in the wrong hands or mistaken for the real thing it can bring chaos. As the saying goes 'When you play the game of thrones you win or you die.' It seems Walmart played and they've merely been slapped on the wrist.

$16,000? Is That All?

Sixteen thousand gold dragons...err dollars? Is that the price for potentially endangering the lives of New Yorkers? Walmart earns FORTY NINE MILLION dollars on average a day?! I can not believe my ears. I suppose even a Mother of Dragons must admit that some battles are fought with coin rather than fire. But this fine seems less like a dragon's breath and more like a sneeze. Perhaps a strongly worded letter from yours truly would have been more effective. "Dracarys!" might remind them of the importance of following the rules you know?

Third Party Treachery!

Ah the classic excuse: 'It wasn't me it was them!' These third party sellers are like the Varys' of the retail world whispering in the shadows and causing mischief. Walmart must now ensure these merchants adhere to the laws of the land. They must cut off any who try to peddle these dangerous trinkets. After three offenses Walmart will terminate those who deal these toy guns but I would advice them to be like Greyworm and his Unsullied army. Absolute and relentless in order.

Walmart's Promise: A New Vow?

Walmart has promised to implement policies to prevent further sales of these prohibited items. I hope their word is as strong as the Iron Throne itself. For if they fail perhaps I should pay a visit to New York myself... with Drogon of course. A little fire can be quite persuasive. As I have said before 'I will take what is mine with fire and blood.' Though in this case I suppose a strongly worded press release will suffice... for now.

A Queen's Final Word

So let this be a lesson to all retailers big and small: The safety of the people must always come first. No amount of gold can replace a life or the peace of mind of a worried parent. Now if you'll excuse me I have dragons to feed and kingdoms to build. And perhaps a strongly worded letter to draft... just in case.