Is Your Parenting Style Making You a Mad Queen! Discover the Truth!

A Song of Searches: Why Are the Smallfolk So Curious?

Hmph it seems the smallfolk across the Narrow Sea are quite preoccupied with… *parenting styles*? Google Trends a contraption I still don't fully understand (something Tyrion would likely explain with tedious detail) indicates a 400% rise in searches. It appears they are lost wandering in a desert of 'gentle,' 'positive,' and 'lighthouse' approaches. But fear not for the term 'authoritative' has risen as the top searched! Perhaps just perhaps they are beginning to understand the need for a firm yet compassionate hand. After all a dragon doesn’t raise itself does it?

Authoritarian: The Way of the Usurper (and Bad Parents)

Now Dr. Mona Amin warns of the dangers of confusing 'authoritative' with 'authoritarian.' One sounds like it might lead to a healthy well adjusted kingdom…the other sounds like the way Cersei might raise Joffrey. Amin describes 'authoritarian' parenting as a 'rigid top down approach,' lacking warmth and filled with 'do it because I said so!' This is not the way to build loyalty or a strong capable heir. It's the way to breed resentment and anxiety like the kind that plagued Viserys (though perhaps in his case it was deserved). Such harshness may yield short term obedience but long term… disaster. Like a wildfire plot gone awry!

Scared Stiff? Not the Targaryen Way!

Aliza Pressman another wise woman (though not as wise as yours truly) claims that authoritarian parenting instills fear not connection. Children raised this way may hide their mistakes leading to even greater dangers. Imagine a young dragon rider afraid to admit they’ve lost control of their beast! The consequences could be… *fiery*. No a parent must be a source of strength not terror. A guiding light not a looming shadow. Like me when I decide to torch my enemies... only I'm generally feared.

Authoritative: The Dragon Queen’s Parenting Handbook (If I Had Children)

Ah but 'authoritative' parenting… this is a style worthy of a Targaryen! Amin says it blends empathy and boundaries – high expectations but also high support. If a child fails to clean their room (or perhaps fails to properly train their dragon) the response is not punishment but understanding and guidance. This takes patience yes but the rewards are great. 'Research shows that it actually is the parenting style that leads to more competent emotionally regulated children and adults who are better at handling life stress or resiliency,' Amin says. Just like me! Except I get stressed when people don't bend the knee... so I burn them.

Boundaries and Freedom: The Perfect Balance (Like My Reign Hopefully)

Pressman adds that authoritative parenting provides children with 'guardrails,' allowing them to feel safe and express themselves freely. As adults they trust their own judgment and have better relationships. This is the type of leadership I strive for! A balance of power and compassion firmness and understanding. Though some might say I faltered in King’s Landing… perhaps I needed a parenting expert then!

Bend the Knee… or Behave! (The Irony of Love)

Apparently a little wiggle room can lead to better behavior. Who knew? 'When you feel loved for who you are and not for how you behave you tend to behave better in the long run,' Pressman says. Well I suppose that makes sense. Though feeling loved doesn't stop me from wanting to burn my enemies to the ground. Perhaps I should enroll Drogon Rhaegal and Viserion into parenting courses... if they were still here. Now if you'll excuse me I have a city to conquer... or maybe just some scrolls to read about 'positive reinforcement'. Dracarys!