Volvo Messes With Texas! 800 Jobs Face Roundhouse Kick!

Volvo's Got a Problem and So Does the Economy!

Listen up folks. Volvo yeah the company that makes those… somewhat tough cars is laying off up to 800 workers. Now I don't usually comment on these things but when companies start messing with the livelihoods of hard working Americans it's time for a Chuck Norris intervention. Remember when the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris... and apparently Volvo's executives are checking their wallets thanks to these tariffs.

Tariffs: The Real Villain!

They're blaming it on 'market uncertainty' and 'demand concerns' due to those pesky tariffs that have been flying around like my fists in a bar fight. Newsflash: The only thing uncertain is how much longer these policies can last before the economy starts doing push ups on its knuckles! If the tariffs keep coming the only things being produced will be tears.

Macungie Dublin Hagerstown: Nowhere is Safe!

These layoffs are hitting Macungie Pennsylvania; Dublin Virginia; and Hagerstown Maryland. It doesn't matter where you live these tariffs will find you and when they do they hit harder than my roundhouse kick in 'Good Guys Wear Black.' This whole situation reminds me of that time I wrestled a bear. Except instead of a bear it's the economy and instead of wrestling it's… well pretty much the same thing.

Volvo's Response: Too Little Too Late?

Volvo claims they 'regret having to take this action' and need to 'align production with reduced demand.' Regret? Alignment? Sounds like corporate jargon to me! The only thing they need to align is their policies with common sense and the only alignment I believe in is between your head and my foot if you try to mess with freedom.

Trucking Troubles: A Freightful Situation!

They're whining about 'heavy duty truck orders' being affected by freight rates regulatory changes and… you guessed it tariffs. Last time I checked a freight train can't be stopped but apparently these tariffs have done the impossible! It's time to haul these tariffs out of here.

Chuck's Prescription: Common Sense and a Roundhouse!

So what's the solution? Simple: Stop the tariffs support American workers and remember before the beginning there was nothing... then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job. And if that doesn't work well there's always the roundhouse kick. Remember my beard has been known to solve economic crises. You've been warned.