This is the Way... to Disney's Earnings Report: Streaming Subscriptions in Carbonite?

The Guild Demands a Report

Wall Street's got its eyes on Disney's fiscal second quarter earnings. They're lookin' for somethin' and I gotta say I'm interested too. Maybe I can get a discount on a Baby Yoda plushie if the numbers are good eh? This is the way… to potential profit. They're expectin' earnings per share of $1.20 and revenue of $23.14 billion. That's a lot of credits in anyone's book.

Mando+ and Chill? More Like Mando+ and...Uh Oh

Last quarter Disney+ did well but they started seein' subscriber losses. Turns out even a bounty hunter like me can't get people to pay more for less. They warned us about a "modest decline" in subscriptions. Modest? That's what they said about the Empire's chances against the Rebellion too. We all know how that turned out. Maybe they need more Beskar armor... for their subscriber base.

Price Hike? I Have Spoken...

The slowdown in streaming growth? They hiked the price. Seems people are less willing to pay extra for Boba Fett's helmet polishin' service. You start messin' with people's credits they start lookin' elsewhere. It's the way of the galaxy. Perhaps they should have taken the bounty hunter approach: offer a reward for new subscribers.

Theme Park Troubles: No More Space Mountain?

The theme parks are usually a safe bet but even those are facin' turbulence. Seems like travel experts are mutterin' about fewer international travelers and somethin' about President Trump's tariffs. I don't follow galactic politics too closely but fewer credits flowin' means fewer families buyin' lightsabers. And that's bad for business. I hear the foot traffic is down since the Covid surge ended. Maybe they need to add a Mando ride? I'm just sayin'.

Succession Wars: Who Gets the Darksaber?

And of course everyone wants to know who's gonna replace Bob Iger. That's a real power struggle right there. Reminds me of when Moff Gideon had the Darksaber. Everyone wanted it. Probably lots of backstabbin' and alliances shiftin' faster than a hyperspace jump.

Developing Story: This is Not the End

This story is developin'. Just like a good bounty hunt you gotta keep track of the target. I'll be keepin' an eye on this for the safety of the foundlings of course. And maybe for that Baby Yoda plushie. I have spoken.