North Carolina's Heisenberg Uncertainty: Judge Rules 'Yeah, Science!' on Disputed Ballots

A Victory? Acceptable!

Well well well. Seems like some folks in North Carolina are having a bit of a shall we say *situation* with their Supreme Court election. This Judge Myers fellow – a Trump nominee no less – decided that fiddling with ballots *after* the election is about as smart as bringing a squirt gun to a meth lab. He ruled that those disputed ballots gotta stay in the mix which if it holds up means victory for that Allison Riggs. And frankly someone needed to step up because clearly these guys couldn't handle the chemistry.

The Devil is in the Due Process

Now this Griffin character he's crying foul saying those ballots are illegal. Claims he just wants to count the *legal* votes. Sounds like someone's trying to apply high school chemistry to a post doctoral problem set. Myers though wasn't buying it. He pointed out that changing the rules of the game after it's already been played is a recipe for disaster – 'confusion and turmoil,' he called it. Personally I think 'chaos' is a better word. It's like trying to dissolve methylamine in the bathtub but you've forgot to add the lye.

Retroactive Reactions: A Chemical Imbalance

Riggs she's already popping the champagne. 'Today we won!' she declared all smiles and sunshine. Griffin and his team are lawyering up talking about appeals. They're saying they're just making sure the count is correct. But let's be honest this whole thing stinks like a batch of poorly ventilated phosphine gas. You don't go messing with people's votes after the fact. It's bad science and it's bad governance. It's like trying to turn lead into gold but you only have access to a microwave oven.

Republicans Gone Wild?

And of course the political spin is in full effect. The Democrats are screaming about an 'attack on democracy,' and the Republicans are muttering about 'legal votes.' Frankly they both sound like they've been huffing too much ether. It's a mess plain and simple. It's like trying to explain the complexities of chirality to a room full of third graders.

The Heisenberg Principle of Elections

Myers even had the nerve to quote other cases! 'You establish the rules before the game,' he said. 'You don't change them after the game is done.' Preach your honor. Preach! Reminds me though you can change the game mid stream if you own the dealership. That's the Heisenberg principle of elections right there. But let's keep that between us.

Stay Out of My Territory

So what's the takeaway here? Well for starters don't try to pull a fast one on the voters. And second if you're going to cook up some election meddling make sure you know your chemistry. Otherwise you might just end up like Griffin – staring at a beaker full of failure. And finally remember I am the one who knocks. Or in this case the one who calls out the BS. Just sayin'.