Jimmy Buffett's Estate War: Even in Paradise, There's Always Infestation!

Margaritaville Mayhem: When Paradise Turns to Plague

Well well well... looks like even the living can't escape the inevitable zerg rush of greed and conflict. This Jimmy Buffett the 'Margaritaville' guy kicked the bucket and left behind a pile of resources ripe for the taking. $275 million? That's enough to start a decent sized Zerg colony! But it seems his widow Jane and some number crunching trustee named Richard Mozenter are at each other's throats like Hydralisks and Marines in a choke point. 'The Swarm hungers and so do the lawyers,' I always say.

Widow vs. Trustee: The Ultralisk of Entitlement?

Jane's throwing larva sized tantrums because Mozenter the co trustee is apparently hoarding information and charging 'excessive fees.' $1.7 million a year? That's enough minerals to upgrade a whole brood of Mutalisks! She claims he's hostile and mismanaging the assets projecting returns that would make a Zerg Drone blush. Meanwhile Mozenter is accusing Jane of being 'uncooperative' and acting in her own self interest. Sounds like a classic case of 'You must construct additional pylons... of lawyers!'

Buffett's Empire: A Zergling Rush of Assets

Turns out Buffett wasn't just strumming guitars and sipping cocktails. He built an empire! Real estate planes (perfect for Overlords am I right?) musical equipment and a massive stake in Margaritaville. That place is practically a Zerg hatchery for beach bums and margarita enthusiasts. He even planned for this... with a will that's been tweaked more times than a Zergling's mutation.

Trust Issues: When Co Trustees Become Enemies

But here's where things get interesting. Buffett wanted a co trustee Mozenter to manage things with Jane. Now they're flinging legal acid at each other like Lurkers in a trench. Jane says Mozenter is belittling her and withholding information. Mozenter claims Buffett was worried about Jane's ability to manage the assets. So we have a case of 'My life for Aiur!'... or you know millions of dollars.

Wealth Transfer Wars: A Sign of the Times

Apparently this is just the tip of the iceberg. Trillions of dollars are about to change hands and families are gearing up for battle like they're facing a Protoss death ball. Lawyers are rubbing their hands together ready to feast on the chaos. The article says Buffett could have made Jane the sole trustee but he didn't trust her enough? That's cold even for me!

Lessons from the Ashes: Don't Let Your Estate Become a Roach Motel

The lawyers are saying Buffett should have communicated his plans better and that friends don't always make good trustees. Well duh! Should have called in the Queen of Blades. I would've straightened things out. The best part is that it would have been dealt with quickly. As I always say 'Hope is a prison.' And so is a poorly planned estate!