DoorDash CEO Tony Xu: From Broke to Billions, a Meth-odical Rise to Power

No Half Measures: A CEO's Pandemic Gamble

So this Tony Xu guy right? Back when the world went belly up with the 'rona he decided to *cut* commissions for restaurants. My first thought? 'Are you sure about this pal?' Keith Yandell his Chief Business Officer probably had the same thought – IPO looming profits looking thinner than Jesse after a three day bender. But Xu he had a plan. 'If restaurants don't thrive we cannot,' he said. Smart. Business 101 really. You can't sell blue sky and expect people to buy it. Sometimes you gotta sacrifice a little to make a whole lot more. Like when I had to give up some product to keep the DEA off my back. A necessary evil you might say. And for Xu it cost him over $100 million. A bold move let's see if it pays off bitch!

From Stanford to the Stock Exchange: The Rise of an Empire

From a dorm room dream at Stanford to a $90 billion empire? Not bad kid. Not bad at all. Xu's been navigating the cutthroat food delivery game since 2013 and now Wall Street's all googly eyed over DoorDash. Up 23% this year? Someone's been cooking! (metaphorically speaking of course). But slim profits and tariff concerns? Sounds like they are in danger. But that's not stopping Xu's master plan: consolidation. Just like when I was building my empire. He's scooping up Deliveroo and SevenRooms like they're a couple of chili P available at Los Pollos. Smart play taking advantage when the big tech deals are drying up.

Always Evolving: Innovation or Just Plain Greed?

Xu says they're always trying to innovate. Sure pal. I've heard that one before. It's always about making more product right? DoorDash bought Caviar and Wolt expanding reach. Classic empire building. Gotta admire the ambition. He is expanding his territory his empire. I know a thing or two about territory. Remember Gale? He was good but he didn't have the killer instinct like I did. Just like my blue meth Tony Xu is always looking for a better formula.

Suburban Domination: A Different Kind of Blue Sky

While others were busy fighting over city centers DoorDash went after the suburbs. Smart. Less competition more desperation. When COVID hit they cleaned up. Revenue tripled in 2020 and grew 69% in 2021. The perfect storm. I could've used a pandemic back in my day. A golden opportunity to expand my 'business'. And the customer first focus is paying off. A man provides and in this case Xu provides food.

The Cost of Convenience: A Restaurant's Dilemma

High commissions huh? 30% cut? That's a hefty price. But restaurants are paying it because DoorDash is the kingpin. 67% market share? Respect. (Even if those profits are razor thin.) Still a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Business is business. It's not personal. I remember when I had to make some difficult decisions to protect my business. Sometimes you have to break bad to do good.

The Legend of Xu: Dilapidated Hondas and Golden State Dreams

This guy Xu is a trip. Drives an old Honda plays basketball with the staff. Sounds like someone I used to know... me! He personally approved the first 4,000 hires? Dude is hands on. Mornings answering complaints evenings on calls with international regions. He’s hustling. You gotta respect the hustle. Just like I hustled in my RV cooking up that perfect batch. This Xu guy he’s not just building a company; he's building a legacy. He's building an empire. Like I did. And those people who doubted him? They're probably kicking themselves now. Just like those fools who underestimated Walter White.