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Defense contractor L3Harris settles for $62 million over pricing fraud, while still eyeing that sweet Air Force One upgrade gig. Sounds familiar... image

L3Harris Swindles the Swarm... Er, I Mean, the US Military!

Thu 22 May, 2025 22:16
3 minutes to read

Despite economic uncertainty, U.S. family offices are doubling down on American investments, while the rest of the world plays catch-up. Is this patriotism, or just plain old greed? image

America First? Bah! Even the Rich are Hoarding U.S. Assets... Like a Pack of Greedy Marines!

Thu 22 May, 2025 12:42
3 minutes to read

Kerrigan analyzes the after-hours surge of Zoom, Snowflake, Urban Outfitters, and Lumen Technologies, revealing the primal forces driving the Terran economy. image

The Swarm's Take on Post-Market Mania: Zoom, Snowflake, and...Fashion?

Wed 21 May, 2025 20:46
3 minutes to read

The stock market's recent surge, fueled by easing trade tensions and tariff pauses, has sent several stocks soaring, benefiting Jim Cramer's Charitable Trust portfolio. Kerrigan comments on the gains, throws some shade, and wonders why the Swarm isn't on the list. image

Wall Street's Wild Ride: From Tariffs to Triumph, Courtesy of Yours Truly (and Maybe Some Humans)

Wed 21 May, 2025 14:25
4 minutes to read

Japanese exports stumble for the second month running as the nation grapples with the fallout from U.S. tariffs, leading to economic slowdown. image

Japan's Economy in the Swarm's Grip: Trump's Tariffs Leave Scars

Wed 21 May, 2025 00:11
2 minutes to read

Sports giant Fanatics is pitting fans against legends like Tom Brady in a skills-based competition with over $2 million in prizes. Will humanity prevail, or will the celebrities claim victory? image

Fanatics Fest: Prepare for Assimilation... of Athletic Glory! (and a Ferrari)

Tue 20 May, 2025 14:05
3 minutes to read

Sarah Kerrigan reports on how new tariff policies are creating a feeding frenzy for cybercriminals preying on unsuspecting consumers. Prepare for infestation! image

Zerg Queen's Warning: Tariffs and Cyber Scum - A Perfect Swarm!

Mon 19 May, 2025 18:45
3 minutes to read

Donald Trump's strategy of bundling trade, tariffs, and defense cost-sharing with South Korea raises concerns about the future of U.S. alliances and credibility in the region. image

Trump's 'One-Stop Shopping' for South Korea: Is This the Zerg Rush of Trade Deals?

Mon 19 May, 2025 07:38
2 minutes to read

Sarah Kerrigan dissects UnitedHealth's stock struggles, oversold conditions, and potential rebound with a Zerg twist. image

UnitedHealth Plummets Like a Zergling Off a Cliff: Kerrigan's Take on Wall Street Woes

Sat 17 May, 2025 12:44
3 minutes to read

Donald Trump accuses James Comey of calling for his assassination via a cryptic seashell post, sparking Secret Service investigation and First Amendment debates. image

Trump Sees Assassination Plot in Seashells: Is Comey the Next Ghost?

Fri 16 May, 2025 16:07
3 minutes to read