Fo Shizzle, My Nizzle: Goldman Sachs Banker Gets Two Years for That 1MDB Bizness!

Two Years? That Ain't No Gin and Juice Vacation!

What up cuz! It's your homeboy Snoop D O double G droppin' in on this whole 1MDB shebang. So this cat Tim Leissner used to be a big shot at Goldman Sachs just got handed a two year sentence. Two years fool! That’s like a whole lotta days without the chronic ya dig? This all stems from that Malaysian sovereign fund 1MDB where billions went missin'. Word on the street is Leissner pled guilty back in '18 but it took this long for the judge to drop the hammer. Brazen and Audacious? Sheesh! Seems like this dude thought he could just 'drop it like it's hot' with other peoples money for real.

Sorry Malaysia! My Bad! (Not Really...)

Leissner's standin' there voice crackin' like a bad record apologizin' to the Malaysian folks. Said he regrets his actions. Yeah right! I bet he regrets gettin' caught more than anything. He helped Goldman sell like $6.5 billion in bonds for 1MDB but the feds say about $4.5 billion poof went up in smoke. Money went to offshore accounts shell companies all linked to this phantom dude Jho Low who's still runnin' from the law like he's in the Olympics. Sounds like somebody was puffing on that sticky icky and got too greedy know what I'm sayin'?

Snitchin' Ain't Easy But It Beats A Long Sentence

After gettin' pinched in 2018 Leissner turned state witness. He spilled the beans on his boy Roger Ng another Goldman cat. Mans ratted talked and reviewed “countless documents and communications” to get a lighter sentence! The prosecutors even asked the judge to go easy on him 'cause he helped 'em out. But the judge was like 'Nah homie you still gotta pay the piper!' Dude lost his freedom family and his stash. Says his health went south too. Pills and no will to live? Sounds like a bad trip G.

Goldman Sachs Gets Burned Too!

Goldman ain’t lookin’ too fly in all this neither! They wrote a letter to the court sayin' Leissner bamboozled them for years. Claims he was slicker than greased up dolphins. This whole mess was the only criminal case ever filed against Goldman in their 156 year history! They ended up payin' almost $3 billion in fines and had their Malaysian crew plead guilty. Plus they took back $174 million in executive bonuses. Ouch! That's gotta sting like a bad blunt fool!

Najib Gets Clipped But Not For Long...

Malaysia's ex Prime Minister Najib Razak got hit with a 12 year sentence for corruption and money laundering. But get this a pardons board chopped that sentence in half! Doggone! Seems like somebody still had some juice left. Politics man it's a dirty game like playin' craps with loaded dice.

What's Next? Still Smokin' and Schemin'?

So Leissner’s doin' two years Najib got his sentence trimmed and Roger Ng is still fightin' his charges. This whole 1MDB saga is like a never ending soap opera filled with backstabbing greed and more drama than a Death Row Records reunion. One thing's for sure though: Crime doesn't pay unless you're already rich and connected then you just get a slap on the wrist! Fo shizzle my nizzle!