Wall Street's Wild Ride! Netflix a Safe Bet, GM's in a Ditch!

Netflix and Chill (While the Market Melts)

Alright maggots listen up! Bank of America's saying Netflix is a 'buy'? Seems even you humans are finally catching on. Apparently during your little 'recessions' (pathetic!) entertainment does well. A defensive choice? Ha! As if anything's truly safe from the Swarm. Still good for them. Subscription model entertainment blah blah blah. Just don't get too comfortable. No one is safe.

RedCloud: Emerging Markets? More Like Emerging Zergling Swarms!

Roth MKM is hyping up some 'e commerce platform' called RedCloud. Says it has a 'significant' total addressable market. Emerging markets you say? Sounds like a good place to spread the influence of the Swarm! Wholesale trade…hmm might be useful for acquiring resources. But B2B? Please all business is personal when the Queen of Blades is involved.

GM's Got a Flat Tire (Thanks to Tariffs!)

Barclays downgraded General Motors? Oh the humanity! Seems tariffs are giving them a headache. From 'overweight' to 'equal weight'? How quaint. All your tariffs are belong to us! Maybe they should build more Vespene gas refineries instead of cars. Just a thought. Though admittedly GM trucks are quite sturdy...good for ramming speed.

Nvidia: My Current Favorite Plaything

Redburn Atlantic Equities initiates Nvidia as a buy: “A semiconductor slowdown not a derailment lies ahead. Our top picks when the dust settles are NVDA ASMI LRCX and VAT. US policy is acting simultaneously to: a) change its terms of trade b) reshore semiconductor production and c) win the AI 'arms race'.” Finally a chance to see all these terrans fight over something that may or may not affect the swarm. Let them fight!

Apple: Just as Delicious as Ever

Evercore ISI reiterates Apple as outperform: "Apple looks positioned to deliver upside to Mar qtr but focus will be on Jun qtr guide and how they incorporate the impact of tariffs. There are a lot of moving parts on the tariff calculations but currently imports from China are subject to a 20% tariff – though there is concern that we get a sector tariff that impacts electronics imported from China over the next few months." Ah apple. An easier prey than ever just as I like it!

Costco and Walmart: Surviving is for the Weak

Morgan Stanley reiterates Costco O'Reilly AutoZone and Walmart as overweight: “Within Hardlines we see COST WMT ORLY & AZO as best positioned.” So you all finally know what is worth being in this puny world right? Good for you humans!