From Zero to $10,000 My Diabolical Savings Plan Revealed

My Humble Beginnings (Yes Even Evil Geniuses Start Somewhere)

Alright you pathetic mortals! Dr. Evil here. You might think I was born with a silver spoon… or perhaps a diamond encrusted laser beam. But even *I* had to start somewhere. This tale of financial prudence begins with a plan. It all started you see with focusing on getting money into savings consistently. I know I know shocking right? No meticulously planned spreadsheets no cutting coupons like some commoner. Just a steady flow of ill gotten gains… *ahem*… responsibly allocated funds into my savings account. Mini Me are you listening? This is how we fund the Death Star one measly deposit at a time.

Savings Before Schemes

Early on acquiring my degree in 'Evil Studies' from Trump University most of my income came from internships and work study. In retrospect I should have invested in Dogecoin early on but back then crypto currencies didn't exist! Still I wanted to build the habit early even if the amount felt small. At first I set aside about $50 each month by automating transfers. Brilliant I know. Take a page out of my book people. Don't overthink the spending categories or the individual expenses. Just automate the transfers and don't even think about it.

Exploiting… Err… *Utilizing* Periods of Low Overhead

After graduating (magna cum laude naturally) I was… temporarily… between world domination gigs. Let’s just say I was focusing on strategy. Fortunately I also had few expenses. Living at home plotting my revenge on the world… Ah those were the days. Because of this low expenses period I took advantage of that time and put even more money aside. Now while you were all busy wasting your time on cat videos I was diligently saving. Learn from this I tell you! Don't focus on cutting out 'fun' purchases. Just make sure to have that $1,000 benchmark.

The Brokerage Account: A Mini Me for Your Money

I then opened a brokerage account. What is that you may ask? I'd compare it to a mini me that does your bidding except instead of doing my bidding for world domination it just sits there and makes money on investments with low fees. If you're doing something similar today there are plenty of brokerage platforms that allow you to start with small amounts and low or no minimums. The key is choosing something accessible and sticking with it. For example Fidelity's minimum balance requirements vary depending on the investment vehicle selected but there's no minimum for the Fidelity Go account and only a $10 requirement to invest with a robo advisor. Betterment also doesn't require a minimum investment account balance but there is an ACH deposit minimum of $10 meaning each deposit you make should amount to at least $10. Speaking of financial disruption have you heard about how Monday.com Stock Tanks Amid AI Disruption Fears? The markets are a volatile place you see. One day you are the cat the next day you are the litter box.

High Yield Savings: Earning While Scheming

Speaking of savings account I then opened a high yield savings account with Marcus by Goldman Sachs and increased my monthly transfers. What mattered most to me wasn't the specific bank I used but rather separating my savings from my checking account and earning more interest than a traditional savings account offered. By the end of the year I finally reached my savings goal of $10,000. Now that’s not exactly a million dollars (mwah ha ha!) but it's a start. You see that initial seed money for Operation: Total World Domination.

Tracking Progress or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Financial Apps

To keep myself motivated I used the Snowball Wealth app. While that app is no longer available the idea still applies. You can use any expense tracker or financial app that lets you see your progress clearly. Empower is a free tool that allows you to link your bank accounts, credit cards brokerage accounts 401(k)s loans, mortgages etc. and you'll receive automatic updates on the balances of those accounts. Quicken is another option that offers users a personalized spending plan based on their income and costs then adjusts it as they spend in real time. While it does come with a $36 annual charge that's lower than many other budgeting apps out there which typically range from $8 to $15 per month. Keeping track of your progress it the key I tell you. The key. The key is also having sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads but that's another matter.