OpenAI Going Rogue Is Artificial Intelligence About To Break Up With Humanity!

Hello Lawyers My Old Friends

So I couldn't help but wonder... is OpenAI about to have a messy breakup with its own conscience? Like when Big told me he was moving to Paris – except instead of moving to Paris OpenAI's planning to move to like Wall Street. A group of ex employees Nobel laureates even *law professors* (cue dramatic music) have sent a letter to attorneys general basically saying 'Hold up! This for profit thing? It's a bad idea!' Apparently this restructuring would 'subvert OpenAI's charitable purpose.' And honey in this town charitable is *always* in style. Or it should be.

From Nonprofit to Profit Monster?

Remember when Mr. Big bought me that hideous swan purse? Seemed sweet at first but turned out to be a harbinger of doom! Well OpenAI originally a fluffy do gooder nonprofit is considering going full on 'Greed is Good' for profit. They made their name with ChatGPT you know the thing that writes better emails than I do after three cosmos. But some people are worried that chasing the almighty dollar will make them forget their duty to humanity. Duty to humanity! It’s like when Stanford Blatch reminded me to use my blinker when driving important but easy to forget!

The Ex Files: OpenAI Edition

It seems some former OpenAI employees are about as happy about this as Samantha was when Richard Wright called her by another woman’s name. They’re saying OpenAI leadership repeatedly promised that their 'primary fiduciary duty is to humanity.' Now *poof* it's all about the Benjamins! One ex employee Nisan Stiennon even suggested OpenAI might build technology that could *get us all killed*! Suddenly a bad date with a commitment phobe seems like a walk in Central Park.

A Response or a Red Herring?

OpenAI is trying to play it cool saying they'll be just like their competitors which let’s be honest are basically tech world sharks circling for blood. They claim their nonprofit will be *strengthened*. Right and I'm sure Big was just *taking a break* when he skipped our wedding. An OpenAI spokesperson said that "Our Board has been very clear: our nonprofit will be strengthened and any changes to our existing structure would be in service of ensuring the broader public can benefit from AI." Riiiight.

Musk vs. Altman: The Tech World's Newest Feud

Oh and because no drama is complete without a good old fashioned celebrity feud Elon Musk (yes *that* Elon Musk) is in a legal battle with OpenAI's Sam Altman over this whole for profit thing. Twelve ex OpenAI staffers are even supporting Musk's lawsuit! Talk about a complicated love triangle… or in this case a complicated tech… octagon? Is that a thing? Also did I mention that OpenAI's valuation is a cool $300 billion? Maybe I should pivot to AI journalism instead of writing about shoes. Just kidding!

Will Humanity Get Ghosted?

The big question is: will OpenAI choose profits over people? Jason Green Lowe from the Center for AI Policy put it perfectly: "If this is how OpenAI behaves when it's still notionally subject to nonprofit oversight it's terrifying to imagine how they'll behave after they're freed to focus entirely on maximizing profits." It's like that guy who's *kinda* nice but you just *know* he's a monster underneath. So as I scribble away I can't help but wonder: in the age of artificial intelligence is humanity about to get… ghosted?