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Showing 41 to 50 of 136 news articles

According to some fancy pants analysts, AI stocks are about to skyrocket, possibly even higher than Cleveland's bathtub after he eats too many beans. Also, less McDonald's because people are finally losing weight. What?! image

Giggity! AI Stocks About to Get Hotter Than Lois in a French Maid Outfit!

Tue 10 June, 2025 13:15
3 minutes to read

Chaos in California as Trump threatens to arrest Newsom, deploys Marines, and Newsom sues. It's crazier than the time I fought Liam Neeson! image

Holy Crap Lois! Trump Wants to Arrest Newsom and Deploy the Marines! Giggity Giggity!

Mon 09 June, 2025 20:20
2 minutes to read

Stellantis resurrects the V-8 Hemi engine for Ram 1500 trucks after admitting ditching it was a HUGE mistake, like that time I tried to build a rollercoaster in the backyard. image

Holy Crap Lois! The Hemi's Back! Ram Admits They Screwed Up Big Time!

Thu 05 June, 2025 18:24
2 minutes to read

Europeans are feeling down in the dumps, thinking their countries are falling apart, and the rich are getting richer. Time for a beer and a chicken fight! image

Europe's Gone to Pot: Is Everyone Going Bonkers Over There?

Fri 06 June, 2025 11:04
3 minutes to read

Jared Isaacman's NASA nomination bites the dust after Trump gets the grumps with Elon Musk; Shift4 gets a new captain too! image

Holy Crap Lois! Trump Dumps Space Dude After Elon Musk Ticked Him Off!

Wed 04 June, 2025 23:04
4 minutes to read

The German government thinks Amazon's playing dirty with prices, and things are about to get messier than a cutaway gag! image

Holy Crap Lois! Germany's Mad at Amazon Like I'm Mad at Giant Chicken!

Mon 02 June, 2025 15:11
2 minutes to read

Peter Griffin breaks down the premarket trading news, from steel tariffs making Cleveland-Cliffs go 'whee!' to taxes on sports betting that are making Flutter and DraftKings cry into their beer. image

Giggity! Tariffs, Vaccines, and Gambling Taxes, Oh My! A Peter Griffin Financial Round-Up

Mon 02 June, 2025 13:07
2 minutes to read

Peter Griffin reports on American Eagle's disappointing earnings, blaming everything from bad merchandising to those darn tariffs! image

American Eagle's Flightless Quarter: Turns Out Teens Don't Want to Dress Like Eagles Anymore!

Thu 29 May, 2025 20:11
2 minutes to read

Peter Griffin reports on how tariffs are making Best Buy sing the blues, forcing them to lower their expectations faster than Lois lowers her standards when I bring home a new pet. image

Giggity! Best Buy's Gone Bust (Kind Of) Thanks to Those Darn Tariffs!

Thu 29 May, 2025 12:01
3 minutes to read

Peter Griffin reports on HP's earnings miss, blaming it all on tariffs and wondering if he can still afford cable. image

Holy Crap Lois! HP's Stock Took a Bigger Dive Than Me at Career Day!

Wed 28 May, 2025 21:55
2 minutes to read