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Mando reports on South Korea's central bank cutting interest rates amidst political chaos and looming tariffs, a fiscal situation more complicated than navigating the asteroid field near Tatooine. image

This is the Way... to a Rate Cut: South Korea's Fiscal Fiasco

Thu 29 May, 2025 01:57
2 minutes to read

Breaking down Salesforce's Q1 results, AI advancements, and why even with a muted market response, we're still stanning this stock. Like, literally. image

Salesforce's 'Rents Due' Moment? We're Buying it Dolls!

Thu 29 May, 2025 00:53
3 minutes to read

The U.S. is set to revoke visas of Chinese students with ties to the Chinese Communist Party or those in critical fields, raising concerns about academic freedom and international relations. Honestly, sometimes the Ministry... I mean, the government... baffles me. image

Accio Education? U.S. to Yank Visas of Chinese Students, Leaving Me Utterly Gobsmacked!

Thu 29 May, 2025 01:26
3 minutes to read

Elon Musk wraps up his government gig, leaving behind a trail of 'wasteful spending' cuts and a whole lot of legal drama. Cue the glitter pens and breakup songs! image

Elon Says 'So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen' to Trump's Washington: A Swiftie's Take

Thu 29 May, 2025 01:27
3 minutes to read

A federal court slaps down Trump's tariff act, ruling he overstepped his presidential powers. It's complicated, baby, one more time! image

Oops!... He Did It Again! Trump's Tariff Tantrums Tossed Out by Court! Toxic!

Thu 29 May, 2025 01:56
3 minutes to read

Eric Cartman reports on the looming trade war between the US and China, where Trump wants high-tech stuff and China's all like, 'Respect my authoritah!' image

Screw You Guys, I'm Building a Trade War! Cartman's Take on Trump vs. China

Thu 29 May, 2025 00:09
3 minutes to read

CNBC's Jim Cramer channels my inner Xenomorph-fighting spirit to dissect the AI threat to human jobs, and it ain't pretty. image

AI Apocalypse Now: Cramer Warns of Job Carnage and Corporate Greed

Wed 28 May, 2025 23:00
2 minutes to read

Reports indicate rising investor anxiety over potential U.S. debt struggles, leading to increased insurance purchases against default, yet experts suggest this reflects political concerns rather than imminent financial doom. image

A Shadow of Doubt? Investors Eye U.S. Debt with Wary Insurance, But Fear Not, For Now!

Wed 28 May, 2025 23:49
2 minutes to read

A post-market dive into Nvidia's triumph, chip stock woes, and the surprising resilience of Foot Locker – plus, why even Bitcoin is going mainstream, Hylia be praised! image

Hyrule Hears: Nvidia Soars While Chip Stocks Stumble Like a Bokoblin!

Wed 28 May, 2025 23:42
2 minutes to read

Mario dives into the after-hours trading results, where Nvidia jumps like a super mushroom, HP takes a dive, and other companies have their own adventures! image

It's-a Me, Mario! Reporting on the Stock Market Kingdom! Wa-hoo!

Wed 28 May, 2025 22:14
2 minutes to read