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Showing 31 to 40 of 130 news articles

Good News, Everyone! Oil Moguls Shrug at Impending Doom (Probably)

Mon 16 June, 2025 05:12
3 minutes to read

Energy CEOs play the waiting game as tensions rise between Iran and Israel, affecting global oil markets. Will the Strait of Hormuz stay open? Stay tuned, meatbags! image

Good News, Everyone! Oil Moguls Shrug at Impending Doom (Probably)

Mon 16 June, 2025 05:12
2 minutes to read

Despite recent turbulence and production hiccups, Boeing forecasts a sky-high demand for new airliners, especially in Asia, while they try to avoid becoming the next Planet Express ship. image

Holy Pilot Light! Boeing Predicts a Plane-t Full of New Jets by 3044!

Sat 14 June, 2025 23:32
2 minutes to read

Geopolitical tensions send markets into a tailspin, while Amazon tinkers with its health biz, and Meta snags AI talent. Plus, iPhones are ditching China for India! image

Good News Everyone! Middle East Mayhem Meets Market Meltdown!

Fri 13 June, 2025 19:04
3 minutes to read

Following Israeli airstrikes on Iran, investors are scrambling for safe-haven assets like gold and oil, proving that even impending doom has a silver, or golden, lining. image

Good News, Everyone! War is Good... For the Economy (Maybe?)

Fri 13 June, 2025 07:16
3 minutes to read

GameStop dives into Bitcoin and trading cards, leaving Wall Street scratching their heads like a three-eyed mutant trying to solve a Rubik's Cube. image

Holy Bender's Booty! GameStop Goes Crypto Crazy and Card Collecting!

Thu 12 June, 2025 17:10
3 minutes to read

Nvidia CEO warns that U.S. restrictions on AI chips could inadvertently hand the future of AI to China's Huawei. image

Good News, Everyone! Huawei Might Take Over the World (Thanks, America?)

Thu 12 June, 2025 09:46
3 minutes to read

President Trump's proposed savings accounts for kids get CEO support, but experts are scratching their heads. Leela's here to break it down, Bender-style! image

Holy Guacamole! Trump Accounts: A One-Eyed Mutant's Take on the Future of Kid Savings

Wed 11 June, 2025 16:48
3 minutes to read

Turns out, even in the 31st century's past, everyone's ditching the U.S. dollar faster than you can say 'Good News, Everyone!' Buckle up, it's devaluation time! image

Holy Dollar, Fry! Asia Dumps the Greenback Like Last Week's Slurm!

Wed 11 June, 2025 08:12
3 minutes to read

Meta dives headfirst into the superintelligence game with a new AI research lab and a mountain of cash for Scale AI. Will it lead to utopia or robot uprisings? Only time (and my cyclopean eye) will tell! image

Zuckerberg's Brainchild: Meta's Quest for Total World Domination Through Superintelligence! (Or Just Another Tuesday)

Tue 10 June, 2025 17:20
3 minutes to read