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Showing 11 to 20 of 87 news articles

European insurance companies face staggering losses from California wildfires, proving that even the most fortified empires can crumble under the weight of nature's fury. Guess the Swarm isn't the only thing burning things to the ground... image

California Screamin': Wildfires Torch Insurance Giants' Wallets!

Sun 25 May, 2025 23:18
4 minutes to read

A federal judge slams the Trump administration for botching the deportation case of a gay Guatemalan man, highlighting systemic errors and raising serious due process concerns. Looks like someone needs some spine crawlers to hold them accountable! image

Trump Admin's Deportation Disaster: Even I, Kerrigan, Can See the Roach in This Plan!

Sat 24 May, 2025 10:24
3 minutes to read

A federal judge slams the Trump administration for a deportation blunder involving a gay Guatemalan man, proving even the Swarm makes fewer mistakes. image

Trump Admin's 'Horror' Show: When Due Process Gets Zerg Rushed!

Sat 24 May, 2025 10:24
3 minutes to read

Donald Trump proposes massive tariffs on the European Union, sparking market jitters and fears of a trade war. Looks like someone is ready to 'unleash the swarm' on international economies! image

Trump Threatens EU with 50% Tariffs: Feels Like a Zerg Rush on Global Trade!

Fri 23 May, 2025 14:11
3 minutes to read

Defense contractor L3Harris settles for $62 million over pricing fraud, while still eyeing that sweet Air Force One upgrade gig. Sounds familiar... image

L3Harris Swindles the Swarm... Er, I Mean, the US Military!

Thu 22 May, 2025 22:16
3 minutes to read

Despite economic uncertainty, U.S. family offices are doubling down on American investments, while the rest of the world plays catch-up. Is this patriotism, or just plain old greed? image

America First? Bah! Even the Rich are Hoarding U.S. Assets... Like a Pack of Greedy Marines!

Thu 22 May, 2025 12:42
3 minutes to read

Kerrigan analyzes the after-hours surge of Zoom, Snowflake, Urban Outfitters, and Lumen Technologies, revealing the primal forces driving the Terran economy. image

The Swarm's Take on Post-Market Mania: Zoom, Snowflake, and...Fashion?

Wed 21 May, 2025 20:46
3 minutes to read

The stock market's recent surge, fueled by easing trade tensions and tariff pauses, has sent several stocks soaring, benefiting Jim Cramer's Charitable Trust portfolio. Kerrigan comments on the gains, throws some shade, and wonders why the Swarm isn't on the list. image

Wall Street's Wild Ride: From Tariffs to Triumph, Courtesy of Yours Truly (and Maybe Some Humans)

Wed 21 May, 2025 14:25
4 minutes to read

Japanese exports stumble for the second month running as the nation grapples with the fallout from U.S. tariffs, leading to economic slowdown. image

Japan's Economy in the Swarm's Grip: Trump's Tariffs Leave Scars

Wed 21 May, 2025 00:11
2 minutes to read

Sports giant Fanatics is pitting fans against legends like Tom Brady in a skills-based competition with over $2 million in prizes. Will humanity prevail, or will the celebrities claim victory? image

Fanatics Fest: Prepare for Assimilation... of Athletic Glory! (and a Ferrari)

Tue 20 May, 2025 14:05
3 minutes to read