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Warren Buffett announces Greg Abel as his successor, proving even billionaires know when to let the young blood take over, just like I let my stunt team handle the really crazy stuff! image

Holy Smokes! Buffett Passes the Torch Like a Scene from a Police Story!

Sat 03 May, 2025 18:27
2 minutes to read

Jackie Chan breaks down the potential economic showdown between China and the U.S., filled with rare earths, tariff kicks, and maybe a few too many diplomatic face-slaps! image

Wah! China's Got the Kung Fu Grip on U.S. Economy? I Gotta See This!

Fri 02 May, 2025 17:44
3 minutes to read

Jackie Chan humorously reports on Chevron's recent stock dip, profit decline, and repurchase plans amidst fluctuating oil prices, drawing parallels to action-packed movie scenarios. image

Chevron Tumbles! Is This My Cue for an Action Movie Rescue?

Fri 02 May, 2025 12:27
2 minutes to read

Amazon reports strong earnings but faces tariff headwinds, leaving investors in a state of 'drunken master' uncertainty. Time for some serious action! image

Amazon's Tariff Tussle: A Kung Fu Comedy?

Thu 01 May, 2025 22:22
3 minutes to read

Amazon's Q1 results beat expectations, but tariff woes and soft guidance send the stock into a spin – even I'm dizzy! image

Amazon's Tariff Tumble: Why Even a Kung Fu Master Can't Predict the Future!

Thu 01 May, 2025 22:22
2 minutes to read

Wells Fargo predicts the S&P 500 might revisit recent lows due to ongoing trade and economic uncertainties, but Jackie Chan offers a humorous spin and some investment wisdom! image

S&P 500 Rollercoaster! Jackie Chan's Take on Wall Street Woes!

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:24
2 minutes to read

Jackie Chan reports on the U.S.-Ukraine mineral deal, a blend of economics, politics, and maybe a little bit of payback, all while keeping things 100% Jackie Chan style! image

Wa Wa! U.S. and Ukraine Team Up for Mineral Mayhem!

Thu 01 May, 2025 06:22
3 minutes to read

Jackie Chan reports on Microsoft's surprising earnings, driven by AI and a little bit of luck, maybe I can invest! image

Microsoft Kicks Butt! Like a Drunken Master!

Wed 30 April, 2025 20:24
2 minutes to read

President Trump's preferred mode of transportation, the golf cart, faces tariff implications due to its reliance on globally sourced components, highlighting the complexities of 'Made in America' claims. image

Even Trump's Golf Cart Can't Escape the Trade War! Holy Smokes!

Wed 30 April, 2025 15:57
3 minutes to read

Jackie Chan gives his take on experts predicting the British pound will surge, potentially reaching pre-Brexit levels as the U.S. dollar weakens, thanks to trade policies and economic factors. It's gonna be a fight! image

Pound Power! Jackie Chan Predicts British Currency Will Kick Dollar's Butt!

Wed 30 April, 2025 05:20
3 minutes to read