Paramount and HBO Max Mega-Merger Makes Streaming Great Again

A Deal Like No Other

Folks let me tell you this deal is HUGE. Really really big. Paramount and HBO Max joining forces? It's tremendous. It's going to be the best streaming service maybe ever. You know some people are saying it's going to be bigger than Netflix maybe even bigger than sliced bread. And that's saying something. This is going to be great for the country believe me.

HBO Stays HBO It's True

We're keeping HBO. Some people thought it would go away SAD. HBO is top tier the best in the business with shows that are just incredible everyone loves them. David Ellison is a smart guy I like David he knows HBO should stay HBO. It’ll be a sub brand a very important sub brand the best sub brand just like keeping 'Make America Great Again,' we’re keeping HBO great! And speaking of great deals you know what else is interesting? Goldman Sachs Automates Pirate Booty with AI now that's innovation folks. Innovation at its finest just like this merger.

Sports Sports and More Sports

Forget about the fake news because this sports offering? Unbelievable. We’re talking NFL MLB NHL March Madness – the whole shebang! Nobody will have more sports. People will say 'Wow that’s a lot of sports.' And they’ll be right. We have all the best leagues all the best teams. This is a major victory for sports fans everywhere. They'll be saying this is the best deal for sports ever. And they won't be wrong they will be right.

The Regulators? No Problem

The regulators? They’re going to love it. Trust me this is so good for competition so good for the consumer that they’ll be thanking us. No antitrust issues here folks. We have so many great things in this deal the best things that everybody wins. It's a win win maybe even a win win win. I know a lot about deals the best deals and this one is fantastic.

The Streaming Graveyard

HBO has been on a journey a very long journey. HBO Go HBO Now HBO Max Max and now back to HBO Max. People get confused. But now with Paramount we are putting an end to the chaos. This is the end of the line for streaming services of the past and the beginning of something YUGE. We’re building a streaming empire. The best greatest most tremendous streaming empire in the history of streaming.

Making Streaming Great Again

So there you have it. Paramount and HBO Max together at last. It's a beautiful thing a tremendous thing a great thing. This is how you make streaming great again. We're bringing back the best content the best sports and the best experience. So get ready folks because this is going to be something special. It's going to be…wait for it…LEGENDARY. Absolutely legendary.