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Showing 1651 to 1660 of 2543 news articles

Footwear giant Skechers is being acquired by 3G Capital for $63 a share, ending its public run. Is this a smart move, or just another casualty of the trade war? Rambo investigates. image

Skechers Gets Swallowed Whole: 3G Capital Shells Out, But Will They Survive?

Mon 05 May, 2025 20:58
2 minutes to read

Credit Suisse AG settles for $511 million after conspiring to hide over $4 billion in offshore accounts for wealthy Americans, proving even in finance, truth and justice prevail... eventually. image

By Hera! Credit Suisse Pays the Price for Hiding Billions!

Mon 05 May, 2025 21:05
2 minutes to read

Palantir's revenue surges with AI adoption, but stock dips. Dr. Evil contemplates world domination...with AI, naturally. image

Palantir's AI Domination: Are We Talking Sharks With Frickin' Laser Beams Attached to Their Heads?

Mon 05 May, 2025 22:22
2 minutes to read

The S&P 500's winning streak ends amid trade deal uncertainty, sparking fears of a 'bear-market rally' and cautious consumer spending. image

S&P 500 Stumbles: A 'Bear-Market Rally' in Disguise? 'Til All Are One' with Caution!

Mon 05 May, 2025 20:12
2 minutes to read

Actor Jon Voight proposes tariffs on foreign films to President Trump, leading to market confusion and industry pushback. image

Illogical! Trump Considers Tariffs on Foreign Films, Hollywood Reacts

Mon 05 May, 2025 22:19
3 minutes to read

Ford Motor navigates treacherous tariff territory, suspending its 2025 financial guidance due to President Trump's tariffs, while still managing to outpace Wall Street's expectations. image

Ford Hits a Snitch, Suspends 2025 Forecast Amidst Trump's Tariff Jinx!

Mon 05 May, 2025 21:50
3 minutes to read

Captain Jack Sparrow reports on OpenAI's decision to restructure as a public benefit corporation while keeping its nonprofit at the helm, navigating treacherous legal waters with Elon Musk and aiming for the horizon of Artificial General Intelligence. image

Savvy Sparrow's Scoop: OpenAI Sails a New Course, Still Chasing the Horizon!

Mon 05 May, 2025 20:08
4 minutes to read

A messaging app used by a former national security advisor faces a security breach, leading to temporary suspension and raising questions about data privacy. Chuck Norris weighs in with his signature blend of action and wit. image

TeleMessage Hacked: Even Chuck Norris Can't Roundhouse Kick Cyber Threats Away!

Mon 05 May, 2025 19:56
2 minutes to read

OPEC+ floods the market, sending oil prices into a four-year nosedive, while Leela ponders if this means cheaper Blernsball tickets... or maybe just a new eye! image

Good News, Meatbags! Oil Prices Plummet Like Bender at an All-You-Can-Eat Buffet!

Mon 05 May, 2025 19:13
3 minutes to read

President Trump's claim of sub-$2 gasoline prices faces scrutiny as data reveals higher costs at the pump, sparking debate over economic realities and political narratives. image

Reality Check: Did Gas Prices Really Break the Matrix, or Just Trump's Truth Social?

Mon 05 May, 2025 19:45
3 minutes to read