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Even with tariffs causing chaos, Microsoft's like, 'Meat! We're still getting stronger!' and makes more money than everyone thought. AI's the new treasure! image

Shishishi! Trump's Tariffs? Microsoft Just Wants More Meat on the Bone!

Wed 30 April, 2025 23:19
2 minutes to read

Professor Farnsworth reports on how Trump's trade policies are causing online retailers to cut back on Facebook and Instagram ads, impacting Meta's revenue and Reality Labs unit. image

Great News Everyone! Trump's Tariffs Cause Meta Meltdown!

Wed 30 April, 2025 23:51
3 minutes to read

Microsoft's financial results have shown better-than-expected quarterly growth, driven by its Azure cloud business, and issued surprisingly strong guidance, leaving investors feeling 'mischief managed'. image

Blimey! Microsoft's Shares Soar Higher Than a Nimbus 2000!

Wed 30 April, 2025 22:24
3 minutes to read

Meta reports strong Q1 earnings, exceeding expectations, but faces challenges from ad spending and European regulations. A disturbance in the Force, there is. image

Meta's Force Awakens: Earnings Soar, But Shadows of Uncertainty Loom!

Wed 30 April, 2025 22:16
2 minutes to read

Amazon plans to invest $4 billion in expanding its rural delivery network, promising faster shipping times and more jobs, while UPS cuts jobs due to reduced Amazon deliveries. image

Amazon's $4 Billion Rural Delivery Blitz: Is Jeff Bezos Trying to One-Up My Philanthropy?

Wed 30 April, 2025 21:17
3 minutes to read

Kim Kardashian weighs in on Trump's trade war with China, potential supply chain issues, and the possibility of having fewer dolls for North...like, never! image

OMG! Is Trump's Trade War About to Ruin My Shopping Sprees?!

Wed 30 April, 2025 21:46
2 minutes to read

Microsoft's latest earnings report shows a significant boost driven by Azure, proving that sometimes, the real treasures are in the cloud, not buried in the sand. image

Microsoft's Cloud Soars Higher Than My Hat! Quarterly Profits Unearth a Treasure Trove!

Wed 30 April, 2025 20:24
3 minutes to read

Bugs Bunny reports on Meta's surprisingly good Q1 earnings, a bit of trouble in Europe, and a whole lotta AI spending. Curious, ain't it? image

Eh, What's Up, Doc? Meta's Makin' Bank!

Wed 30 April, 2025 20:24
2 minutes to read

A keen observation of the White House's

Elementary, My Dear Investors: Trump's Trade Tango with India!

Wed 30 April, 2025 18:34
3 minutes to read

Tommy Shelby analyzes Qualcomm's Q2 earnings, diversification strategy, and the looming Apple split, all while navigating the treacherous waters of Wall Street. image

Qualcomm's Gamble Pays Off: A Shelby Company Report

Wed 30 April, 2025 20:11
2 minutes to read