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Showing 411 to 420 of 877 news articles

Republican candidate Judge Jefferson Griffin concedes after months-long legal battle to overturn his defeat in the North Carolina Supreme Court race, marking a victory for Democratic Justice Allison Riggs and a reaffirmation of the people's will. image

By Hera! Democracy Prevails in North Carolina: One Judge's Quest to Overturn Election Results Meets Lasso of Truth!

Wed 07 May, 2025 19:45
3 minutes to read

Dr. Evil analyzes Trump's latest power play: A new ambassador, looming tariffs, and world domination... maybe. image

One Million Tariffs! Trump Sends New Minion to China! Mwahaha!

Wed 07 May, 2025 20:02
2 minutes to read

Cybersecurity firm CrowdStrike announces layoffs citing AI advancements, while reaffirming financial forecasts and sparking market reaction. But don't worry, Autobots are still hiring! image

CrowdStrike Cuts 500 Bots... I Mean Humans! AI to Blame, Says Optimus Prime

Wed 07 May, 2025 20:04
2 minutes to read

Carvana defies expectations with record sales and earnings, driven by consumer behavior amid tariff anxieties. A surprising, but ultimately logical, outcome. image

Carvana's Stellar Performance: Is This Logic, Or Just Good Fortune?

Wed 07 May, 2025 20:11
3 minutes to read

Eddy Cue drops a truth bomb, suggesting AI could dethrone Google, sending both Apple and Alphabet stocks into a downward spiral faster than a tutu-wearing rhino on roller skates. image

ALLLLRIGHTY THEN! Apple and Google's Love Nest Gets a Serious AI Infestation!

Wed 07 May, 2025 16:55
3 minutes to read

Mr. Bean reports on the possible name change of the Persian Gulf, stirring up more trouble than a stray teddy bear at a fancy tea party. image

Holy Haberdashery! Trump Wants to Rename the Persian Gulf!

Wed 07 May, 2025 16:56
2 minutes to read

Despite macro concerns, Disney's strong quarterly results and optimistic guidance have analysts predicting a profitable resurgence. But remember, there's no fate but what we make for ourselves... image

Disney's 'I'll Be Back' Moment: Analysts Believe the Mouse Will Roar Again!

Wed 07 May, 2025 16:53
3 minutes to read

Tony Montana breaks down the high-stakes trade negotiations between the U.S. and China, where everyone's playing hardball and nobody wants to lose face. image

Say Hello to My Little Tariff: China and the U.S. Trade War Gets Real!

Wed 07 May, 2025 18:06
3 minutes to read

Air traffic control woes, old tech, and staffing shortages plague Newark Airport, causing flight delays and raising safety concerns. Captain Jack Sparrow investigates! image

Savvy Skies or Scurvy System? Newark Flights Grounded!

Wed 07 May, 2025 17:37
3 minutes to read

Chuck Norris weighs in on the Federal Reserve's decision to hold interest rates steady amidst trade policy uncertainty and economic volatility. image

Federal Reserve Holds Steady: Does the Economy Need a Roundhouse Kick?

Wed 07 May, 2025 18:27
2 minutes to read