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Optimus Prime reports on ESPN's new streaming service, its pricing, and bundle deals, with a Cybertronian twist. image

ESPN's New Streaming Service: One Shall Stand, One Shall Stream!

Tue 13 May, 2025 15:06
2 minutes to read

A Vulcan analysis of Nvidia's deal to supply AI chips to Saudi Arabia, the political implications, and the logical (or illogical) absence of Tim Cook. image

Nvidia's Blackwell Chips: A Calculated Gamble in the Shifting Sands of Saudi Arabia

Tue 13 May, 2025 16:30
3 minutes to read

The Trump administration slashes another $450 million in grants to Harvard, citing discrimination concerns, but the university is fighting back harder than Voldemort after a Horcrux hunt. image

Trump's 'Expelliarmus' Charm Fails? Harvard Still Standing After Funding Freeze

Tue 13 May, 2025 14:47
2 minutes to read

Master Yoda analyzes Hertz's recent financial woes, stock offering, and strategic shifts with a humorous and insightful perspective. image

Hertz Hits a Speed Bump: A Jedi Master's Take on the Plunging Stock

Tue 13 May, 2025 20:08
2 minutes to read

A look at the escalating student loan delinquency rates in America, the impact on credit scores, and why we need a Windows update for higher education financing. image

Student Loan Crisis: Are We Rebooting the System or Just Ctrl+Alt+Deleting Dreams?

Tue 13 May, 2025 17:00
3 minutes to read

Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer throws a wrench in Trump's potential new Air Force One, and honestly, it's a total buzzkill for luxury! image

OMG! Chuck Schumer's Shady Move to Block My Ride?!

Tue 13 May, 2025 18:39
2 minutes to read

Coinbase's stock experiences a massive surge following its addition to the S&P 500, marking a significant milestone for the crypto exchange amidst a volatile period. image

Coinbase to the Moon! S&P 500 Inclusion Sends Shares Soaring! To Infinity and Beyond!

Tue 13 May, 2025 20:07
2 minutes to read

The bizarre tale of a New Jersey deli scheme, a brutal prison attack, and a family's fall from grace. image

Deli Disaster: From $100 Million Dreams to Thai Prison Nightmares

Wed 14 May, 2025 13:42
3 minutes to read

YouTube is set to stream an NFL game live for the first time ever, broadcasting the Chiefs vs. Chargers clash in Brazil, bringing a whole new level of wilderness to football. image

YouTube Goes Wild: Streaming NFL in Brazil! Time to Improvise, Adapt, Overcome!

Tue 13 May, 2025 18:54
3 minutes to read

Ragnar Lothbrok reports on the projected lower Social Security cost-of-living adjustment for 2026, pondering tariffs, drug prices, and the gods' fickle nature. image

Odin's Misery! Social Security Promises Less Mead for 2026 Feast!

Tue 13 May, 2025 19:35
2 minutes to read