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Dutch chip giant ASML faces uncertainty due to US trade restrictions, raising concerns about future demand and potential impact on the semiconductor industry, especially artificial intelligence. image

ASML's Chip Sales TANK! Is Skynet Next?!

Wed 16 April, 2025 08:06
4 minutes to read

Japan's Fair Trade Commission slaps Google with a cease and desist order for anti-competitive practices on Android, joining a global trend of scrutiny against the tech giant. image

Google Gets a Spanking From Japan! Is This the End of Search Engine Domination?!

Wed 16 April, 2025 04:27
3 minutes to read

Indiana Jones investigates how US trade restrictions and tariff uncertainty are impacting Dutch chipmaking giant ASML, potentially jeopardizing its revenue forecasts and global customer relations. image

ASML's Chip Troubles! Tariffs Threaten Fortune and Glory?

Wed 16 April, 2025 06:24
3 minutes to read

Shrek reports on how Japan is telling Google to get outta their swamp with anti-competitive practices on Android devices, joining the U.S. and UK in giving the tech giant the stink eye. image

What in Tarnation! Japan Slaps Google with Anti-Monopoly Order!?

Wed 16 April, 2025 03:11
3 minutes to read

Figma, the design software ninja, is officially prepping for an IPO after their Adobe acquisition deal bit the dust. Will they become the next Hokage of Silicon Valley? image

Believe It! Figma's Going Public! Is This Their Ninja Way?!

Tue 15 April, 2025 21:53
2 minutes to read

Nvidia faces a $5.5 billion hit due to U.S. export restrictions on AI chips to China, raising concerns about future growth and competition. image

Nvidia's China Crisis! Is This the End of the AI Chip Boom?

Tue 15 April, 2025 22:13
3 minutes to read

Leaked emails reveal Mark Zuckerberg contemplated spinning off Instagram in 2018 amidst rising antitrust concerns. Is Zuck's empire crumbling? image

Zuckerberg Considers Instagram Spin-Off Are You Serious!?

Tue 15 April, 2025 19:37
2 minutes to read

Amazon surveys third-party sellers on the impact of lingering Trump-era tariffs in 2025, revealing potential price hikes and business closures. image

Amazon Sellers Face the EMPEROR'S Wrath! Will the Tariffs Choke the Life Out of Their Business?

Tue 15 April, 2025 17:39
3 minutes to read

Elliott Investment Management takes a $1.5 billion stake in Hewlett Packard Enterprise, sending HPE shares soaring, and maybe they need a hero like me to sort things out. image

HPE Stock Soars Thanks to Elliott! What Would Duke Do?

Tue 15 April, 2025 15:32
3 minutes to read

Britney Spears reports on how China's export controls on rare earth elements could leave the U.S. military vulnerable, darling! It's complicated, like my love life! image

Oops!...They Did It Again! China's Rare Earth Monopoly Threatens US Military Readiness!

Tue 15 April, 2025 12:30
3 minutes to read