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Tariffs on China are predicted to raise the cost of iPhones significantly, according to Wedbush analyst Dan Ives, potentially causing major disruptions for Apple and consumers. image

Is Your iPhone About to Cost 2000 Dollars!?

Fri 11 April, 2025 14:00
3 minutes to read

Federal Reserve's Neel Kashkari suggests Trump's trade war is causing investors to lose faith in the U.S. economy, leading to a drop in the dollar and a rise in Treasury yields. Time to kick some economic ass and chew bubblegum! image

Has America Lost Its Mojo? Investors Are Ditching US Assets Like Yesterday's Hail to the King Baby!

Fri 11 April, 2025 14:01
3 minutes to read

Khaleesi reports on the latest consumer sentiment survey, revealing economic fears and inflation dragons soaring higher than ever before! image

Winter is Coming...For Your Wallet! Are We Headed For Recession?

Fri 11 April, 2025 14:22
4 minutes to read

Larry Fink's Recession Warning: A critical analysis of BlackRock CEO Larry Fink's recent recession predictions, coupled with my (Klaus Schwab's) expert commentary on the role of global megatrends in navigating economic uncertainty and AI. image

Is the US Economy Doomed? BlackRock CEO Sounds the Alarm! (But Don't Worry, We Have AI!)

Fri 11 April, 2025 14:08
4 minutes to read

Bank of America says American Express can withstand consumer spending slowdown, upgrading the stock to 'buy' despite a recent pullback, but can we really trust them? image

American Express Stock: Is This Downtick Really an Opportunity or Just Another Capitol Trick?!

Fri 11 April, 2025 11:57
3 minutes to read

Major League Baseball faces financial shifts, attracting private equity interest amidst potential lockouts and evolving media rights. image

Baseball on the Brink! Will Moneyball 2.0 Save America's Pastime?!

Fri 11 April, 2025 11:00
3 minutes to read

The Federal Trade Commission and Meta are going head-to-head in an antitrust trial that could force Meta to divest Instagram and WhatsApp. Is Zuckerberg about to face his Heisenberg moment? image

Zuckerberg's Empire Strikes Back! Will Meta Lose Instagram and WhatsApp?

Fri 11 April, 2025 11:00
3 minutes to read

JPMorgan Chase, Morgan Stanley, and BlackRock lead the charge with surprisingly strong earnings, while gold shines and Nvidia bounces back. Giggity! image

Giggity! Banking Bonanza and Golden Opportunities! What's Making Headlines Before the Bell?

Fri 11 April, 2025 12:11
1 minutes to read

Stewie Griffin reports on Morgan Stanley's surprisingly successful first quarter, fueled by stock trading and global volatility, with a touch of Stewie's signature wit and disdain. image

Morgan Stanley Just Did WHAT?! You Won't Believe Their Profits!

Fri 11 April, 2025 12:02
3 minutes to read

I'm Eric Cartman and I'm reporting on Morgan Stanley's killer first quarter, proving once again that rich people get richer while the rest of you are probably still playing World of Warcraft. image

Morgan Stanley Makes Bank While You Sit on Your Fat Ass!

Fri 11 April, 2025 12:02
3 minutes to read