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Puss in Boots reports on the U.S. exploring alternatives for Air Force One amid Boeing delays, with whispers of Qatari jets and Elon Musk's involvement! image

Holy Guacamole! Is Trump Trading Boeing for a Flying Carpet?

Thu 01 May, 2025 15:30
3 minutes to read

Donkey reports on Trump's potential new Air Force One, swapping Boeing's delays for L3Harris's magic touch – could this Qatari jet be the swamp cooler he needs? image

Air Force One Gets a Donkey-Sized Upgrade! Is Trump Trading Boeing for a Flying Carpet?

Thu 01 May, 2025 15:30
3 minutes to read

Amazon's chucking a billion smackers a year at movies, hoping to drag Hollywood out of the digital dumpster. Will it work? Who cares, as long as there's beer! image

Bite My Shiny Metal Projector: Amazon Saves Hollywood (Maybe?)

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:00
3 minutes to read

Microsoft's shares jump as strong cloud growth and AI investments propel the company to exceed expectations, proving that sometimes, even in the Muggle world, a little bit of magic exists. image

Microsoft's Azure Soars: Is This Tech Giant Using Felix Felicis?

Thu 01 May, 2025 15:53
3 minutes to read

Scorpion reports on Apple's Q2 earnings as tariffs loom, threatening sales and China's market share. Will Apple choose Kombat, or will it suffer defeat? image

Get Over Here! Apple's Earnings Face Trump's Tariff Fatality!

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:00
2 minutes to read

Wells Fargo predicts the S&P 500 might revisit recent lows due to ongoing trade and economic uncertainties, but Jackie Chan offers a humorous spin and some investment wisdom! image

S&P 500 Rollercoaster! Jackie Chan's Take on Wall Street Woes!

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:24
2 minutes to read

Ace Ventura investigates Amazon's Q1 earnings report, tariff troubles, and AI ambitions! image

ALLLLRIGHTY THEN! Amazon's Earnings Under the Tariff Microscope!

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:01
2 minutes to read

Mr. Bean tries to understand the new Republican plan to change student loan repayments. It involves numbers, income, and possibly Teddy getting involved. image

Oh Dear! Republicans Tinker with Student Loans: Bean's Brain Boggles!

Thu 01 May, 2025 15:18
3 minutes to read

Elon Musk questions the Federal Reserve's $2.5 billion renovation, sparking debate over government spending and priorities. Is this progress, or just another Skynet in disguise? image

Elon Musk vs. The Fed: No Fate But What We Make (Them Pay For!)

Thu 01 May, 2025 15:33
3 minutes to read

Anthropic's Claude AI is now integrating with business apps like Asana, PayPal, and Square, taking actions for users and potentially making them obsolete. Time to make some REAL money! image

Say Hello to My Little Friend...Claude: AI Gets Ballsy, Starts Running Your Business!

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:03
2 minutes to read