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Business owners and consumers are panic buying in anticipation of President Trump's tariffs, potentially leading to an 'artificially high' economic activity followed by a slowdown. image

Trump's Tariffs Trigger Economic Mayhem! Is Your iPhone Doomed?!

Sun 20 April, 2025 18:14
2 minutes to read

Leaked draft executive order reveals potential sweeping changes to the U.S. State Department, including embassy closures, bureau eliminations, and hiring overhauls, all under the banner of 'America First.' image

Trump's State Department Shakeup! Are They Finally Getting Rid of All the Dumbasses?

Sun 20 April, 2025 18:13
2 minutes to read

Learn from Hollywood's costly estate planning mistakes and protect your treasure, even if you're not swimming in gold like King Zora. image

Hey Listen! Dont Let Your Rupees Vanish Like a Fairys Breath! Estate Planning for Everyone!

Sun 20 April, 2025 14:00
3 minutes to read

U.S. companies are worried about Trump's tariffs, leading to panic buying and a potential shift towards used and refurbished tech devices. It's-a me, Mario, with the scoop! image

Mama Mia! Trump's Tariffs Cause Panic Buying! Will Americans Go Used?

Sun 20 April, 2025 14:24
2 minutes to read

Lara Croft reports on Senator Van Hollen's journey to El Salvador to fight for due process after a wrongful deportation, a quest not unlike raiding a tomb for justice. image

Constitutional Crisis?! Senator's El Salvador Mission Sounds Like One Of My Adventures!

Sun 20 April, 2025 15:06
3 minutes to read

Fred Flinstone reports on how Japan, South Korea, and Taiwan might invest in a huge Alaskan gas project to make Trump happy and dodge those pesky tariffs. It's a great deal, even better than a bronto burger! image

Yabba Dabba Doo! Is Alaska About to Get Richer Than Mr Slate?!

Sun 20 April, 2025 15:05
3 minutes to read

Rick Sanchez breaks down how Trump's tariff shenanigans are messing with the stock market and potentially your pathetic little investments, with a healthy dose of cynicism and quantum uncertainty. image

Is Your Portfolio Screwed Thanks to Trump Tariffs?! (Spoiler: Maybe)

Sun 20 April, 2025 12:23
3 minutes to read

As stock market volatility rises, experts advise near-retirees on how to protect their portfolios and navigate the 'danger zone' of the first five years of retirement. image

Retirement Apocalypse Avoided! Are You Ready for the Danger Zone?!

Sun 20 April, 2025 13:10
2 minutes to read

Bernstein says Chinese internet stocks are looking good, like a comeback story for the ages, despite trade tensions with the U.S. and some rocky regulations. Time to get back in the ring? image

Yo Adrian, China Tech Stocks Are Back From the Dead Like Apollo Creed!?

Sun 20 April, 2025 12:49
3 minutes to read

Wall Street analysts highlight three dividend-paying stocks – Energy Transfer, The Williams Companies, and Diamondback Energy – that can weather economic uncertainty and consistently reward investors. image

Recession Proof Your Portfolio With These Dumb Good Dividend Stocks?! Analysts Say YES!

Sun 20 April, 2025 12:41
4 minutes to read