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Albert Einstein analyzes the Bank of England's concerns over potential U.K. growth shock from U.S. tariffs, highlighting the uncertainties and inflationary pressures. image

E=mc²...or is it E=Tariffs Times Confusion? Bank of England Grapples with Trump's Trade Tango

Thu 24 April, 2025 16:19
3 minutes to read

Some boring old dudes are arguing about cash vs. stocks. Jinx says: Stocks! Explosions! What's the diff?! image

CASH IS KING? NAH, MORE LIKE CASH IS A CHUMP! (Says Jinx, Obviously)

Thu 24 April, 2025 15:32
2 minutes to read

Goku reports on the stock market's unexpected power-up, thanks to tech gains and (maybe) softening trade tensions. But watch out for those tricky tariffs! image

Kamehame-HA! Stock Market Goes Super Saiyan!

Thu 24 April, 2025 15:44
2 minutes to read

Goldman Sachs and Bank of America say Hesai Group, the lidar sensor maker, is set to quack in the face of global trade tensions, even if Donald Trump keeps tariffs higher than my temper! image

Aw, Phooey! Hesai Group to Weather Trade Storm Like Scrooge McDuck Swims in Gold!

Thu 24 April, 2025 15:56
2 minutes to read

Forrest Gump reports on how Perplexity AI is buddying up with Motorola to put AI right in your pocket, just like Jenny in my heart. It's like a box of chocolates, you never know what kinda questions you're gonna ask! image

Stupid is as Stupid Does: Perplexity AI and Motorola Go Together Like Peas and Carrots!

Thu 24 April, 2025 16:24
3 minutes to read

Motorola integrates Perplexity AI directly into its phones, aiming to make AI the next big thing. I, for one, welcome our new AI overlords... or at least find it mildly interesting. image

Perplexity AI and Motorola: This Changes Everything (Maybe)

Thu 24 April, 2025 16:24
2 minutes to read

ServiceNow's impressive Q1 results and optimistic forecast demonstrate the power of order in a chaotic world, even with Elon Musk sniffing around. image

ServiceNow Cleans Its Room: A Jungian Analysis of Tech Earnings and Elon Musk

Thu 24 April, 2025 15:51
3 minutes to read

Despite macroeconomic anxieties, ServiceNow's Q1 results soar, fueled by AI and government contracts, proving order can emerge from chaos. image

Clean Your Room and Invest: ServiceNow's Unexpected Triumph in the Chaos Dragon's Lair

Thu 24 April, 2025 15:51
3 minutes to read

Alphabet's Q1 earnings are in, and Agent J is on the case, investigating AI arms races, regulatory battles, and whether self-driving cars can outrun a neuralyzer. image

Google's Alphabet Earnings Report: An MIB Perspective - Are They Human... or Just Wearing Suits?

Thu 24 April, 2025 16:00
3 minutes to read

Alphabet's Q1 earnings report reveals a tech giant navigating AI competition, regulatory scrutiny, and market fluctuations with a mix of innovation and strategic acquisitions. image

Google's Q1 Earnings: Shaken, Not Stirred by AI Rivals and Regulatory Storms

Thu 24 April, 2025 16:00
2 minutes to read