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President Trump considers redirecting funds from Harvard to trade schools, sparking debate about the value of higher education and vocational training. image

May the Odds Be Ever in Your Favor...At Trade School? Trump's Harvard Funds Gambit

Thu 29 May, 2025 15:57
3 minutes to read

Dwight Schrute reports on Boeing resuming airplane deliveries to China, trade war survival, and the perilous state of the paper industry if Boeing truly succeeds. image

BOEING'S CHINA COMEBACK: A THREAT LEVEL MIDNIGHT FOR PAPER COMPANIES!

Thu 29 May, 2025 15:24
4 minutes to read

Salesforce beats expectations but analysts throw shade, reminding me of Jesse after a cook gone wrong. Time to break down this volatility with a bit of chemistry and maybe a dash of blue. image

Salesforce's Wild Ride: AI Dreams, Analyst Nightmares, and My Own Heisenbergian Take

Thu 29 May, 2025 14:56
2 minutes to read

The 'Magnificent Seven' stocks are surprisingly cheaper than they were at the start of 2025, while the rest of the market is looking a little too pricey, says some lady from Empower Investments. image

Giggity! Magnificent Seven Stock Prices Drop Faster Than My Pants!

Thu 29 May, 2025 16:20
3 minutes to read

Stewie Griffin analyzes Omada Health's upcoming IPO, as the virtual chronic care company aims for a $1.1 billion valuation. image

Victory is Mine! Omada Health's IPO: A Billion-Dollar Plot for World Domination...of Healthcare!

Thu 29 May, 2025 15:33
3 minutes to read

That's right, I, Eric Cartman, am reporting on Jeep's new Cherokee because even I need a sweet ride to haul my Cheesy Poofs...and maybe save Jeep from being totally lame. image

Screw You Guys, I'm Getting a Jeep Cherokee (Maybe, If It's Not Lame)

Thu 29 May, 2025 16:21
2 minutes to read

The Trump administration faces a setback as courts block tariffs, leading to accusations of judicial overreach and a potential Supreme Court showdown. This is one ugly mother... image

Trump's Tariff Tantrum: A Predator's Perspective on Judicial Tyranny

Thu 29 May, 2025 16:20
2 minutes to read

A new index ranks global cities by happiness, with Copenhagen taking the top spot, while the US scores respectably. Rick analyzes if it's worth caring about in the grand scheme of the multiverse. image

Wubba Lubba Dub-Dub! Copenhagen Crowned Happiest City, But Should We Really Give a Schmeckle?

Thu 29 May, 2025 14:00
3 minutes to read

Analysts predict a bullish future for Uber, fueled by ride-sharing demand and autonomous vehicle partnerships, but will human drivers be terminated? image

Uber's Autonomous Ascent: Hasta La Vista, Human Drivers?

Thu 29 May, 2025 14:01
2 minutes to read

Yo Adrian! Sports Team Valuations Are Punch Drunk!

Thu 29 May, 2025 14:25
2 minutes to read