Finance - NewsRetold Latest News

Light
Dark

Showing 31 to 40 of 483 news articles

Ripley Reports: Stock Market Surges to Record Highs, Fueled by AI, Geopolitics, and Economic Stubbornness. Are We Ready for What's Hatching? image

Wall Street's Gone Bug Huntin': AI, Defense Stocks, and a Resilient Economy!

Fri 27 June, 2025 17:58
3 minutes to read

Xiaomi's stock soars after their new YU7 electric SUV, cheaper than Tesla's Model Y, receives over 200,000 orders in three minutes. AI glasses also unveiled, giving Meta a run for their money. Victory is mine! image

Xiaomi's Electric SUV: So Good, It's Practically Illegal (Just Kidding... Mostly)

Fri 27 June, 2025 02:10
3 minutes to read

A humorous look at Nike's sales dip, CorMedix's stock offering, Core Scientific's AI-fueled surge, and Concentrix's earnings miss, all through the eyes of a certain Argentine footballer. image

Nike Stumbles, AI Buzz Lifts Core Scientific: Messi's Take on After-Hours Chaos

Thu 26 June, 2025 21:08
3 minutes to read

The Federal Reserve's decision to loosen capital requirements for big banks draws mixed reactions, potentially impacting financial stability and Treasury market liquidity. Muhahaha! image

One MILLION Dollars! Fed Eases Bank Rules, World Domination Slightly Easier

Thu 26 June, 2025 19:21
3 minutes to read

Optimus Prime analyzes the day's biggest market movers, from Micron's chip slip to Core Scientific's potential AI acquisition, all while pondering the true meaning of transformation. image

Til All Are Bull or Bear: Optimus Prime's Take on Today's Market Mayhem

Thu 26 June, 2025 19:07
3 minutes to read

Federal Reserve proposes easing capital requirements for big banks, sparking debate over systemic risk versus economic growth, in a move echoing the hubris of Khan Noonien Singh. image

Trump-Era Deregulation Resurrected: Is Wall Street About to Boldly Go Where No Bank Has Gone Before?

Thu 26 June, 2025 19:57
3 minutes to read

Mr. Bean stumbles through the stock market, finding chaos and comedy in chipmakers, bitcoin booms, and spicy surprises! image

Bean's Brilliant Business Bloopers: Stocks Edition!

Thu 26 June, 2025 17:21
3 minutes to read

Republican lawmakers are pushing a bill that would significantly impact the financial lives of immigrants, including legal residents, by restricting access to tax benefits and imposing new fees. image

Hasta La Vista, Baby... to the American Dream? GOP Megabill Targets Immigrant Finances

Thu 26 June, 2025 17:10
3 minutes to read

President Trump is considering a 'shadow chair' for the Federal Reserve, potentially undermining Jerome Powell's authority and sparking Wall Street frenzy. image

Say Hello to My Little Fed: Trump's Got Powell in His Sights!

Thu 26 June, 2025 18:25
3 minutes to read

Cartman weighs in on why America's stock market, despite underperforming, is still the least-crappy place to stash your cheddar. Respect my authoritah! image

Screw You Guys, I'm Investing in America! (Because It's Still Better Than Those Other Dumps)

Thu 26 June, 2025 16:10
3 minutes to read