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Showing 81 to 90 of 134 news articles

From stock market surges fueled by Trump's deal to chip stock rallies and analyst reactions, this is your daily dose of Wall Street absurdity, narrated by yours truly. image

Trump's Trade Triumph and Chip Stock Shenanigans! What a Week, Eh?

Thu 08 May, 2025 13:07
3 minutes to read

Ken Griffin, a big shot with more money than God, says Trump's tariffs are going to make life harder for the little people. Oh, the humanity! image

Trump's Tariffs: A Real Kick in the Baby Teeth for the Working Class, Says Some Billionaire

Wed 07 May, 2025 21:31
3 minutes to read

The EU is gearing up to announce countermeasures to U.S. tariffs, signaling a potential escalation in global trade tensions. Oh, the drama! image

EU Readies Retaliation: Prepare for Global Trade Wars, Darlings!

Wed 07 May, 2025 16:22
3 minutes to read

US Treasury and Trade Representatives to meet with Chinese officials in Switzerland to discuss de-escalation of trade war ignited by President Trump. image

Oh Goodie! US and China to Have a Jolly Good Chinwag: Trade War Truce?

Wed 07 May, 2025 00:01
2 minutes to read

Despite exceeding revenue expectations, Palantir's stock price plummeted due to concerns over future growth and high valuation, leaving investors in a state of mild panic and existential dread. image

Palantir Stock Tanks! Is This the End of Their Reign, or Just a Hiccup?

Tue 06 May, 2025 16:11
3 minutes to read

Stewie Griffin dissects Trump's proposed 100% tariff on foreign films, market reactions, and other bizarre economic developments, all while pondering the fate of the Oscars. image

Trump's Tariff Tantrums: Is Hollywood Next to Feel the Sting?

Tue 06 May, 2025 01:15
3 minutes to read

OpenAI's nonprofit structure will remain in control after pressure from civic leaders and a legal battle with Elon Musk. image

Blast Off! OpenAI Avoids Total Takeover... For Now! Nya, ha, ha!

Mon 05 May, 2025 18:25
3 minutes to read

Sky-high tariffs on Chinese goods are forcing exporters to flood the domestic market, leading to price wars and potential economic woes, as China navigates a complex economic landscape amid trade tensions and domestic challenges. image

Good GRIEF! China's Economy Flirts with Deflation Thanks to Trump's TARIFF Tantrums!

Mon 05 May, 2025 03:35
2 minutes to read

Stewie Griffin exposes the hidden anxieties plaguing today's youth and offers (mostly) sarcastic advice on how to cope, based on a recent news article. image

Good Grief! Turns Out Your Spawn Are Secretly Spiraling (And You're Probably Oblivious)

Sat 03 May, 2025 13:52
3 minutes to read

The specter of tariffs looms over the holiday season as retailers grapple with supply chain disruptions and the looming threat of empty shelves. This is worse than the time Bertram stole my time machine! image

Christmas Chaos: Trump's Tariffs Threaten Holiday Cheer, Bah Humbug!

Fri 02 May, 2025 06:26
3 minutes to read