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Showing 11 to 20 of 137 news articles

Elon Musk slams Trump's mega-bill as 'DEBT SLAVERY,' calls out Republican supporters, and hints at forming a new political party. It's more dramatic than a Champions League final! image

Elon's Epic Smackdown: Even I Score More Gracefully Than This Political Fiasco!

Mon 30 June, 2025 21:54
3 minutes to read

Lionel Messi gives his hilarious and insightful perspective on Raising Cane's rise to the top of the chicken fast-food chain, surpassing KFC and aiming for world domination. image

Raising Cane's Overtakes KFC: Messi's Take on the Chicken Kingdom

Mon 30 June, 2025 11:00
4 minutes to read

Like a perfectly timed pass, the markets shrugged off Middle East tensions to achieve record highs, buoyed by cooling energy prices and whispers of interest rate cuts. Even I, Messi, couldn't have dribbled through that much uncertainty! image

GOOOOOOOOAL! Markets Score Record Highs Despite Geopolitical Fouls

Sat 28 June, 2025 20:28
3 minutes to read

A peek into the quantum realm, where tech giants are chasing the holy grail of computing, even if it's still a bit like trying to nutmeg a ghost. image

Quantum Computing: From Benchwarmers to Game Changers (But Still a Ways to Go!)

Fri 27 June, 2025 12:00
5 minutes to read

A humorous look at Nike's sales dip, CorMedix's stock offering, Core Scientific's AI-fueled surge, and Concentrix's earnings miss, all through the eyes of a certain Argentine footballer. image

Nike Stumbles, AI Buzz Lifts Core Scientific: Messi's Take on After-Hours Chaos

Thu 26 June, 2025 21:08
3 minutes to read

Amidst geopolitical turmoil, India pivots towards strengthening its domestic defense sector, turning crisis into opportunity with a focus on homegrown solutions and reduced reliance on foreign arms. image

India's Defense Gets a Messi-esque Boost from Middle East Tensions!

Thu 26 June, 2025 13:22
4 minutes to read

Wall Street's elite are sweating bullets over democratic socialist Zohran Mamdani's potential NYC mayoral victory, fearing tax hikes and tighter regulations. But hey, haven't we seen this movie before? image

Wall Street Freaks Out Over NYC Mayoral Candidate? Relax, It's Just a Game of Cat and Mouse!

Wed 25 June, 2025 21:30
3 minutes to read

Amazon's Ring is unleashing AI-powered notifications for your doorbell, promising to tell you if it's a squirrel or Suárez at your door. But is it a goal or an own goal for privacy? image

Ring-a-Ding-Dong! Even I, Messi, Can't Believe This AI Doorbell Tech!

Wed 25 June, 2025 13:00
2 minutes to read

Despite economic pressures, families are prioritizing back-to-school shopping, with many planning to spend the same or more than last year. Even I, Messi, am surprised! image

¡No Se Rinde La Carteraaa! Back-to-School Spending Stays Strong, Even if My Free Kicks Don't Always Go In

Tue 24 June, 2025 17:14
3 minutes to read

A ceasefire in the Middle East sends oil futures tumbling, leaving even Messi wondering if he needs to downsize his fleet of luxury vehicles. image

Oil Prices Take a Dive! Is My Next Yacht Gonna Be Smaller?

Tue 24 June, 2025 09:19
3 minutes to read