Doctor Evil - NewsRetold Latest News

Light
Dark

Showing 101 to 110 of 131 news articles

Citadel CEO Ken Griffin warns that Trump's trade policies are damaging America's global reputation and financial stability, mirroring my own attempts at world domination...but on a slightly smaller, slightly less hairy scale. image

Is Trump Destroying America's Brand Like I Almost Destroyed Austin Powers!?

Wed 23 April, 2025 17:45
3 minutes to read

Doctor Evil investigates Eli Lilly's legal battle against telehealth companies selling compounded versions of their weight loss and diabetes drugs, uncovering potential corporate villainy and pharmaceutical power plays. image

Eli Lilly's Lawsuit Against Telehealth Companies Is It A Diabolical Scheme?!

Wed 23 April, 2025 10:30
2 minutes to read

Donald Trump issues an executive order targeting the Inflation Reduction Act, potentially benefiting drugmakers by modifying Medicare drug price negotiation rules, while healthcare tech giant Epic Systems emerges from its notoriously private shell. image

Pharmaceutical Companies Rejoice! Trump's Pill Penalty Executive Order Saves the Day! (Or Does It?)

Tue 22 April, 2025 18:15
2 minutes to read

Uncertainty looms over 2025's first-quarter earnings as tariffs and trade tensions cause volatility, impacting major European firms across various sectors. image

Tariff-ied Investors Gasp as Trump's Trade Wars Threaten to Ruin Everything! Are YOU Ready for the Chaos?

Tue 22 April, 2025 05:16
3 minutes to read

Doctor Evil analyzes Chipotle's daring move to open its first restaurant in Mexico, questioning if this is an opportunity for global burrito-based tyranny. image

Chipotle Invades Mexico! Is This My Chance For World Burrito Domination?

Mon 21 April, 2025 13:15
2 minutes to read

A controversial White House letter to Harvard University, demanding changes to DEI programs and international student screenings, was reportedly sent without authorization, sparking a public feud and risking billions in federal funding. Mwahahaha! image

Harvard in Hot Water! Was This White House Letter an Honest Mistake or Pure Evil?!

Sat 19 April, 2025 14:33
2 minutes to read

Target CEO Brian Cornell meets with Rev. Al Sharpton amidst boycott threats and DEI program adjustments, raising questions about corporate strategy and commitment to social justice. image

Target Caves to Woke Mob? Or is it a Diabolical Scheme!

Thu 17 April, 2025 20:59
2 minutes to read

In 1998, Jeff Bezos offered Netflix founders a low eight-figure sum, but they declined, a decision that shaped the future of streaming. They did WHAT?! image

Netflix Turned Down HOW MUCH From Bezos!?

Thu 17 April, 2025 12:55
3 minutes to read

Nissan aims to boost production in the U.S. amidst tariff threats, sparking global domination... or at least a decent profit! image

Nissan's Evil Plan To Dominate America! Will Austin Powers Stop Them?

Wed 16 April, 2025 19:00
2 minutes to read

The WTO predicts a sharp decline in global trade due to Trump's tariff policies, with North America facing a significant export drop and potential risks for developing countries. image

Is This The End Of The World Trade As We Know It?! Trump's Tariffs Trigger Global Meltdown!?

Wed 16 April, 2025 13:21
2 minutes to read